


Of Fire and Fear

by DragonsAndCryptids



Series: Faeries, Demons, and Dragons [8]
Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Anxiety, Blood and Gore, Canon Rewrite, Depression, Dialogue Heavy, F/F, F/M, Gen, Heavy Angst, Human Experimentation, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, Nightmares, Other, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Self-Harm, Torture, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Year long time skip
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-11
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-15 22:15:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 27,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28696044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DragonsAndCryptids/pseuds/DragonsAndCryptids
Summary: Fairy Tail has disbanded. Everyone is moving on. Or at least they try, but it’s difficult to accept the way things are now. Without everyone they’ve had to support them, especially with the Tartaros aftermath, it’s not that easy.Their time apart might be one of the hardest things they’ve ever gone through.
Relationships: Cana Alberona/Lucy Heartfilia/Loke, Chelia Blendy/Wendy Marvell, Cobra | Erik/Midnight | Macbeth, Cubellios | Kinana/Laki Olietta, Erza Scarlet/Mirajane Strauss, Jellal Fernandes/Erza Scarlet, Jellal Fernandes/Erza Scarlet/Mirajane Strauss, Kagura Mikazuchi/Millianna, Levy McGarden/Gajeel Redfox, Natsu Dragneel/Lisanna Strauss, Rogue Cheney/Minerva Orland, Yukino Aguria/Hisui E. Fiore
Series: Faeries, Demons, and Dragons [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1557613
Comments: 12
Kudos: 76





	1. It’s Fine

**Author's Note:**

> I am so so so so excited for this part of the rewrite! Having said that though, PLEASE heed the tags. I’ll give more specific warnings at the beginning of each chapter if applicable, but yeah... this part is going to be very dark

Soft paws prodded at Natsu’s cheek, their pads brushing across his warm scales. “Natsu… please get up. You need to get up.” 

Natsu groaned, his nose scrunching up as he rolled over, dislodging Happy, causing him to let out a quiet _Oof._

“Natsu!” Happy clambered onto his shoulder, and decided to try his luck nipping at his ear instead. 

The dragon slayer growled and shook the exceed off. “Fuck off, Happy,” he grumbled, curling up tighter and shifting his wing so he could hide beneath it. “M’tired…” He was so _tired._ He felt like all he was capable of was sleeping. 

“But it’s already noon!” Happy protested. “And you didn’t want to get up yesterday either!” 

Natsu forced his eyes open and pulled his wing away, squinting at the bright sunlight. “Not like it matters. There’s nothing to do.” They’d just been traveling, alternating between walking and flying (now that his wing had finally healed enough for it), for almost a month now. It was more than okay for him to take a couple days just to rest. 

“You haven’t eaten, either,” Happy pressed on. “I brought you a fish last night, but I couldn’t get you to get up!” 

“Not hungry…” Natsu let his eyes slip shut again. And truly, he wasn’t. He just didn’t feel like eating, let alone putting forth the effort to go fishing or hunting. And this far out in the wilderness, that was all they could do for a meal. Hell, even if they _weren’t_ days and days away from civilization, it wasn’t like they had the money to pay for a meal anyways.

“I’m worried, Natsu…” Happy admitted. “This isn’t like you.” 

Natsu sighed. He knew that. Of course he did. Somewhere in his head. But that didn’t necessarily mean that he _cared._ “Just let me sleep today, and we’ll start moving again tomorrow, alright?” he requested. 

Happy hesitated, but eventually said, “You promise?” 

Natsu opened his eyes again, taking in the concern in Happy’s wide eyes, the way his tail tip swished anxiously, his ears pressing against his skull. “I promise, buddy.” He even forced himself to smile at him. 

“Al-Alright, then…” Happy relented, before padding over to force his way underneath Natsu’s arm and curl up against his chest. “You’re hot,” he said. 

“I’m always hot,” Natsu said, his eyes already drooping again. 

“No, I think you might have a fever,” Happy clarified. “Not even you’re this warm.” 

“S’fine, Happy,” he said. “I promise I’m fine.” 

Because he was always fine. He wasn’t any different, and there wasn’t anything wrong with him. 

There just wasn’t. 

* * *

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Gajeel muttered quietly. “You… you did tell them I was with you… right?” 

Levy tried to hide her smile beneath her hand, but by the way Gajeel was glaring at her, she didn’t think she had succeeded. “Yes, I told them I was bringing a former guildmate. I promise you, they won’t mind. Actually, they’re excited that we’re coming by. I think my sister is even coming to stay with her husband and kids while we’re there.” 

Gajeel’s frown deepened, and Levy realized he would probably only be more uncomfortable with more people there. “But did you tell them it was _me_ you were bringing?” he repeated. 

Levy sighed and turned away from him, not wanting Gajeel to interpret her sad expression as pitying him. It had taken a lot to convince him to come stay with her at her parents while they got their futures figured out, rather than being alone in Magnolia, as literally everyone else had left the town by now. And despite her constant reassurances that her family wouldn’t mind having him around at all, he still seemed convinced they would dislike him. “I gave them a heads up that you were part dragon, they’re polite enough not to say anything about it. I can’t guarantee the same about my sister’s kids, though. They are pretty young.” 

Gajeel readjusted the bag slung over his shoulder. “Think I’ll freak the kids out?” 

“Gajeel, you’re not that scary,” she said with an eye roll. 

“Maybe to you, but y’er used to my face and bastards with big fangs and claws,” he grumbled. 

Levy guessed he _might_ have a point. To small children, or hell, to _anyone_ who didn’t know him, she supposed Gajeel probably _did_ look intimidating, at the least. “I’m sure it will be fine,” she assured him. Even if the kids _didn’t_ like him, they would probably get used to him eventually. Or perhaps she could talk to them about it. “It _will_ be fine. Although… _please_ try not to swear in front of them.” 

“The kids? Fine,” he muttered. 

“No, my entire family,” she requested. “They uh… they don’t like it.” 

“They don’t like _swearing?”_ Gajeel threw his head back and cackled. “Fucking hell, Lev. That’s fucking ridiculous. Who doesn’t cuss?” 

Levy knew she couldn’t expect Gajeel to completely cut out swearing from his vocabulary. “Maybe just don’t say fuck? Just like… stick to hell and damn, alright?” 

“I said I’d _try,”_ he said. “Gods, they really are gonna hate me, huh?” 

“Maybe they’ll think you’re a little… strange,” she admitted. “A little rough around the edges. They really don’t know anything about magic or the ways that guilds work, I don’t think they even watched the Grand Magic Games, but they won’t _hate_ you. If anything, they’ll be overly curious. If they ever get to be overbearing, though, just let me know, and I’ll get them off your back. Now come on.” Before she could overthink it, Levy grabbed his hand and tugged him after her. “It’s just down the road, let’s go!” 

* * *

Gajeel honestly wasn’t sure what he was expecting from Levy’s family. Maybe it was a bunch of small, blue-haired, knowledge-obsessed individuals. Then he realized that he didn’t know how families were normally supposed to look in general, not just Levy’s. Hell, Levy was the only person he actually knew _with_ a normal family. But from what he knew, families were supposed to look like each other, right? (The Strauss siblings certainly shared some similar characteristics). 

So he really wasn’t ready to see that Levy was still a foot shorter than her parents, or that neither one of them had blue hair. 

Honestly he was a little disappointed. 

James and Laura McGarden were two of the most normal looking people Gajeel had ever seen, which he supposed wasn’t saying much, but was true, nonetheless. He supposed if he squinted, they did share similar features with their daughter. Levy had her father’s nose, her mother’s eye color, that kind of thing. 

He just _really_ hadn’t expected the other McGardens to be blond. 

“Oh, sweetie, it’s so good to see you!” Laura exclaimed as she grabbed her daughter and pulled her into a hug. “We read about that— that awful guild you fought against and we were so relieved to hear you were okay!” 

“I’m fine, Mom, I promise,” Levy said, melting into her mother’s touch. She reached her hand out and pulled her father into the hug. “I’m okay.” 

Gajeel took a slow step back, feeling for the step that led off the front porch. He _really_ shouldn’t be here. He shouldn’t have come to meet Levy’s family, or at the least, he should have waited for her to have some time with them before he was here hovering over them. His wings curled around his body, and he shoved his hands into his pockets. 

Unfortunately, it was too late to bolt now. Even if they hadn’t acknowledged him, the McGardens _had_ to have noticed him. He wasn’t exactly inconspicuous. But, he also didn’t care if they thought he was rude (because he _was_ rude), so he turned on his heel and prepared to leave the McGardens little countryside house. 

“And where do you think you’re going, young man?” 

Gajeel froze, his shoulders hunching, before he frowned, and mouthed the words _Young man._ “You talkin’ to me?” he demanded, looking over his shoulder at Levy’s mother. 

“Gajeel!” Levy growled, crossing her arms and glaring at him, probably realizing what he’d been about to do. 

“I… uh…” For some reason, the way Laura was looking at him made him feel extremely guilty. She didn’t seem phased by the dragon bits at all. Or any of the rest of him. 

“Levy told us she was bringing a friend,” James said as he rested his hand on his daughter’s shoulder. “We’ve actually never really met any of the people she knows, we were excited to get to know you.” 

Gajeel let out a breath and awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck. “Right…” He doubted anything he said or did was going to display Fairy Tail in the best light. 

But then again, that didn’t really matter, did it? Because Fairy Tail had disbanded. “Well, name’s Gajeel Redfox. Thanks fer… putin’ me up for a while.” 

“Oh, it’s no trouble. We’ve already got the guest room set up and everything,” Laura said with a wave of her hand. “Come on, come inside.” She held the door open, ushering for him to come in. “Make sure you take off your shoes.” 

“Uh, alright.” Gajeel steeped inside, kicking off his boots as he went. 

Levy smiled at him, and patted his arm as he walked by, doing her best to reassure him. But Gajeel still didn’t think he should be here. 

* * *

Minerva nibbled on a piece of bread, knowing she needed to get something in her stomach. She genuinely couldn’t tell if she felt ill due to not taking care of herself, or if it was her guilt. 

“Minerva,” Rogue said quietly. 

She forced herself to look up at him. “What?” 

“You know why I’m here,” he said. 

“Well I didn’t _ask_ you to be here!” she snapped, though there was no real bite in her words. “Go back to the guild.”

Rogue just sighed and shook his head, before getting up to come sit next to her on the bed. “Can I open the curtains?” 

With her free hand, Minerva clutched at the quilt wrapped around her shoulders. “I… yeah, you can open the curtains.” There was no real reason for her to be wallowing in the darkness like this. Sure, she had been having difficulty sleeping as of late, it seemed demons tended to be nocturnal, and having the blackout curtains drawn made it easier to trick herself into being up during the day, like she needed to be. But that just meant it was dark literally all the time. 

Rogue nodded, and got up to open the curtains. 

She bit back a hiss as sunlight flooded into the little room. She’d been forced into staying with Sting and Rogue after the Tartaros incident. She hadn’t exactly been paying rent on her own place after the Grand Magic Games and she’d gotten involved in Succubus Eye and then Tartaros, and obviously her father was no longer around, so his house wasn’t either. 

If she actually went to the guild and picked some jobs, she’d have enough for a down payment for her own apartment within a couple weeks, but… 

That was why Rogue was here with her, rather than at the guild himself. 

“You should come to the guildhall,” Rogue said, snapping her out of her thoughts. “It’s been a month now.” 

“I… I can’t,” she whispered. 

She didn’t think it would be this _hard._ She didn’t regret coming back with Sting and Rogue, but the first day after they’d gotten back, she’d tried to go to the guildhall, and everyone had just… _stared_ at her. 

It wasn’t hostile, not quite, a few Sabertooth members even tried to make small conversation with her. Elfman Strauss had been particularly friendly, assuring her that he didn’t care at all that she was a demon, after all, his sister had demonic powers and could be comparable to one of the creatures herself. 

His reassurances did nothing to make Minerva feel any better, however. She’d gotten up, and fled back to Sting and Rogue’s while he’d been in mid sentence. 

She had no idea how she was going to do this. 

If they had looked at her with anger, she would have been just fine. She knew anger, she liked anger, it was easily understood. 

If they’d looked at her with fear, she wouldn’t care either. It was only fair for them to fear her. Never mind how she’d treated them all in the past, but now she had horns sticking out of her head, menacing black markings, claws on her fingertips, and a mouthful of fangs. But they hadn’t been scared of her either. 

No, they’d all been looking at her with _pity._

Minerva clutched at the blanket so tightly the fabric tore beneath her claws. The _last_ thing she wanted was pity. She’d rather die than be considered pitiful. 

Sure, she’d made some mistakes, she’d fucked up, all in the name of power, and now she was stuck with this damned body. 

But that didn’t mean she wanted them to look at her _that_ way. 

The only ones who didn’t were Sting and Rogue. 

“You have to eventually,” Rogue said, coming to sit by her side once more. “Come on. You don’t even have to stay very long. Just get a job, maybe a meal. It can be a solo job, or just one with me, and it can be one away from civilization. But you can’t just stay here all the time. That wasn’t the deal. You said you were going to try, that you were going to be a member of Sabertooth, but that’s _not_ what you’re doing now.” 

Minerva bared her teeth in a snarl. “I’ll go when I’m ready!” 

Rogue narrowed his eyes. “I’ll give you another week, Minerva. And if you still won’t leave this apartment of your own volition, I’ll get Sting, and we’ll drag you to the guildhall by force if we have to.” 

Minerva haunched her shoulders, but could grudgingly admit that Rogue… did have a point. It wasn’t like she could just stay here forever. And… and she _did_ want to rejoin Sabertooth, she really did, but… 

But she just _hated_ the way they looked at her. 

“Hey, look at me,” Rogue coaxed. 

She huffed, but looked the dragon slayer in the eye. 

“Just prove to them that you’re as strong as ever,” he said. 

“How the hell did you—?” she began. 

“Slayers are relatively good at sensing emotions,” Rogue said. “You’re more frustrated than anything. And guilty…” He shook his head. “And I’ve known you for a long time, Minerva. I can read you fairly well. And if you don’t want them to pity you, stop hiding and start acting like your regular self.” 

“I’ll think about it,” she relented.

Rogue looked far from pleased with the answer, but gave up pressing her for the time being.

* * *

“Auntie Levy!” two little girls exclaimed, rushing towards Levy and clinging onto her legs. 

Levy giggled and leaned down to hug them. “Hey, girls!” 

Gajeel took a deep breath, and watched Levy ask the girls how they’d been, what school was like. They couldn’t have been more than seven or eight years old. 

He’d only been at the McGardens for about two hours, awkwardly conversing with her parents, when Levy’s older sister had shown up with her kids. Evidently her husband ended up being unable to come, some work thing or something, Gajeel didn’t really care, he was just glad that meant there was one less new person for him to get used to. 

After chattering with them for a few moments, Levy got back to her feet, and gestured to Gajeel. “This is my friend, Gajeel. Gajeel, these are my nieces, Marie and Ellie.” She nudged the girls towards him. 

Gajeel crossed his arms and stared down at them. They weren’t twins, he didn’t think. If he had to guess, he’d say one was about a year older than the other, though they did look similar. Both girls had short, choppy brown hair, just like their mother, and wide brown eyes. 

Levy’s sister, June, stepped over to whisper in Levy’s ear, “I told them what you told me about him, but you know how they get. I’m sorry if they say something rude.” 

Levy shook her head. “I’m sure it’ll be fine.” 

The girls stared at him with wide eyes, and Gajeel forced himself to smile. 

Ellie, the younger one, he assumed, gasped and tried to hide behind her sister. Gajeel just rolled his eyes. 

“Say hello, girls,” June urged. 

“H-Hi…” Marie said, offering Gajeel a small wave. 

The dragon slayer squatted down so that he was eye level with them, and held out his hand. “Nice to meet ya, young lady.” 

Marie grinned and took his hand, excitedly shaking it, before inspecting his claws, and running her thumb across the scars all over his fingers. “Look, look Ellie! He’s got cool claws!” 

Gajeel nearly snorted. She was excited over the claws, but not the wings?

Ellie peered over her sister’s shoulder, nervously gnawing on her lip, but she did her best to smile at Gajeel. 

Gajeel ruffled Marie’s hair. She reminded him a bit of Wendy. Or maybe he just missed his little sister too much. 

Either way, maybe he wouldn’t mind Levy’s family as much as he’d thought he would.

* * *

Levy had no idea what to think. It’d hardly been anytime at all, and Gajeel was already letting her nieces climb all over him, poking at his scales and wings, his claws. Currently, he was letting them braid little ribbons into his hair. 

“Where did you find someone like him?” June asked as she leaned over the kitchen counter, peering into the living room so she could keep an eye on her kids. 

“He joined my guild almost a year ago,” Levy said. “He’s… he’s—” 

“I admit, I got a little nervous when I saw him,” June said. “Of course, I trusted you, so I wasn’t going to say anything, but he… well, he looks like _that._ Your heads up really didn’t tell me much.” 

Levy sighed and focused on the potatoes she was cutting up for dinner. She supposed she couldn’t fault her sister, even if she wanted to. Gajeel didn’t even look human. 

“But he seems like a good guy,” she said. “The girls love him already.” 

“So does Dad,” Levy said with a smile, glancing towards the living room, where her father was talking Gajeel’s ear off about something. It was clear the dragon slayer wasn’t actually paying attention, he was more focused on her nieces, but it was endearing, nonetheless. 

“He’s… strangely good with kids,” June continued. 

Levy shrugged. “Well, he has four younger siblings. I guess it makes sense that he would be.” And honestly… he was probably glad for the distraction, or even just people to treat him… normally. She’d noticed the way the girls had fawned over the scars on his hand, not thinking to ask where they were from or anything like that. It was probably refreshing for Gajeel, after so many people had worried over him after the battle. 

“Ah. They all like him?” her sister asked. “Dragons, I mean?”

“Two of them are,” Levy replied. 

June walked to the sink to wash off some tomatoes. “Hey, Lev…” 

“Hm?” 

“I know Mom and Dad never pry about this kind of thing,” she began. “Honestly, I think they’re scared to know what you’re up to most of the time… but… after you came back from the dead, I decided that I… well I started keeping up with you the best I could.” 

_Shit…_ Levy never liked worrying her family. She knew that was impossible to do for the most part, but it would be so much worse if they actually started looking into the things she got involved in. 

“I watched the Grand Magic Games,” she said. “Not in person, of course. And… and then I read all the news I could on that Tartaros guild… Levy, are you okay? You know you can talk to us, right?” 

“I promise I’m fine,” Levy assured her, as quickly as she could without it sounding fake. “I’m much better off than most.” 

Her sister frowned. “You have a bad leg because of it.” 

“Yes well…” Levy sighed and shifted her weight, realizing that her brace was getting uncomfortable now that June had pointed it out. She was also glad that she’d never actually told her family that Gajeel was the one responsible for that. “It could still be worse.” 

She looked into the living room again, to see Gajeel still halfway listening to her father ramble, and handing her nieces new ribbons when they requested them. 

_It could be so much worse._

“Levy! June!” Her mother stumbled down the stairs, balancing her fancy dishes on her palms. “I finally found the good dishware! How close is dinner to being done?” 

“I promise I’m fine,” Levy assured her sister one more time. “Now come on, let’s not do this right now.” 


	2. Icy Grave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gray and Juvia arrive in Isvan, Hisui and Yukino visit Levy, and Erza wants to begin the search for Mavis's books.

Juvia pulled her fur collar closer, trying to warm her ears and jaw. She didn’t think she’d ever been so cold in her  _ life. _ Fiore wasn’t a  _ cold _ place. Sure, when winter rolled in, the temperature would drop, sometimes there would be dustings of snow on occasion, but it was nothing like Isvan. 

She’d always assumed that Gray’s resistance to the cold was thanks to Ur’s training, and possibly his demonic side, but now… If this was really the place where Gray had grown up, his tolerance to the cold had been building up since he was a little kid. He wasn’t wearing a  _ coat, _ and he wasn’t even shivering. 

Snow whipped around them, the biting winds digging into the exposed skin on her face. 

But despite how miserable she was, Juvia would rather freeze to death than ask Gray to find shelter. 

She wasn’t sure how long they’d been out here. Gray had wanted to find the rubble of his old house, if he could, and while they’d been looking, they’d stumbled across this. 

An old, ragged cross, with Gray and Mika’s names carved into it. Gray’s name had been crossed out, and Juvia wasn’t sure if that made it better or worse. As delicately as he could, Gray had brushed the snow and ice off the wood, and kneeled down next to the memorial. “I’m so sorry…” 

Juvia wanted to comfort him. Truly, she did, but she knew this was something Gray had wanted,  _ needed. _ A place to actually mourn, a grave, something to represent everything he’d lost so he could actually grapple with it. She wasn’t selfish enough to detract from that, to act like she had any right to be here right now. 

So she would stay back, unless he asked her to come closer, and let him have this place. 

* * *

“Gajeel, be a dear and get the door for me,” Laura called from the kitchen. 

Despite staying with the McGardens for nearly a week now, Gajeel didn’t think he was ever going to get used to the ways they addressed him. “Yeah, sure.” He pushed himself off the couch, pretending he hadn’t been halfway asleep when her request had roused him. Levy and June had taken the kids out for a walk, and it was the first time the house had actually been quiet. 

He shuffled towards the door, and sincerely hoped it wasn’t some neighbor or something. He had no idea how they might react to  _ him _ answering the door rather than one of the chipper McGardens. 

He swung the door open. “Hello?” 

“Ah! Mr. Redfox! I didn’t know you were here with Miss McGarden!” 

Gajeel blinked, and it took his mind a few moments to actually register who the two women were. “Princess Hisui!?” he demanded. “What the  _ fuck _ are you doing here?” 

“Well—” she began. 

“Shit.” Gajeel clapped his hand over his mouth, and glanced over his shoulder, hoping that Laura hadn’t heard him swear. By some fucking miracle, he’d managed to keep himself from slipping up in front of her. He still didn’t understand  _ why _ he was so worried about disappointing her, but he really didn’t want to. Luckily, she was still busy in the kitchen. 

“Gajeel, where’s Levy at?” Yukino inquired. “She’s here, isn’t she?” 

“‘Course she is,” he grumbled. “The hell do you think I’d be doin’ at her parents without her?” He rolled his eyes. “But she ain’t in the house right now. The hell do you two even want? How’d you even know we were  _ here?” _

“Well, I’m sure you know that we extended the invitation to Levy to come work for us, and help rebuild the Magic Council,” Hisui began. “She sent back a vague answer, saying she’d consider it. But it’s been awhile since then, and we hadn’t heard anything back. We also knew she was no longer staying at her old address, so we were unable to follow up, until Bisca mentioned that she was going to be staying with her family.”

Gajeel bit back a snarl. He didn’t  _ dislike _ the princess or Yukino, but he hadn’t forgiven them nearly as quickly or easily as everyone else had over the whole Eclipse debacle. And he certainly didn’t like that they’d hunted Levy down like this because she hadn’t given them an answer quick enough. 

“Gajeel? Who is it?” Laura called. “One of the neighbors? Or are the girls back early?” 

“Nah, some work acquaintances of mine and Levy’s,” he replied. “Who need to  _ beat it,” _ he hissed towards them. 

Hisui glared right back, not intimidated by him at all. “I’m not going anywhere until I’ve spoken with Levy! She’s the ideal person for this job, and if she decides she’s not going to take it, we need to immediately start looking for someone else.” 

“She’s thinkin’ about it!” Gajeel said, fighting the urge to flare his wings and bare his teeth at her. Yukino already had her hands on her keys as it was, and the last thing he wanted was to start a fight here. “She’ll give you an answer when she’s—” 

“Oh, Gajeel!” Laura appeared out of fucking  _ nowhere, _ and laid a hand on his shoulder. “Invite these two lovely ladies inside! I’ll put some tea on.” 

“Thank you, ma’am,” Yukino said with a smile, before shoving past Gajeel and forcing her way inside. “That’s very kind of you.” 

“Wha—” 

Hisui followed right after, though she paused to point at Gajeel’s hair and smirk. “The ribbons are cute, Gajeel. Pink is a good color on you.” 

He didn’t bite back the snarl this time. The kids had made it part of their morning routine to fix his hair, and though Gajeel didn’t  _ mind _ it, they were little kids, and they  _ were not _ good at fixing hair. Though he wouldn’t dream of telling the girls that. “Fuck off.” 

“Gajeel!” Laura gasped. 

He went rigid. 

“You  _ better _ not be using that kind of language around Ellie or Marie!” she scolded. 

“No, ma’am,” he mumbled. 

Hisui and Yukino didn’t even bother to try and hide their laughter. 

* * *

Had she not already faced actual dragons before, Hisui was sure she would be at least a little nervous beneath Gajeel’s angry glare, but now… it was nothing. Well, perhaps not nothing. He was still a very intimidating man, even if she ignored the wings and claws and scales and fangs, but it was nothing that Hisui couldn’t deal with. 

She  _ supposed _ she could understand his irritation. After everything his guild had gone through with Tartaros, he and Levy had probably just wanted some time to themselves, to recover, away from the magical world of Fiore for a while. And Hisui had respected that for as long as she could, but the longer they didn’t have an actual Magic Council, the more dangerous it was. Sure, there were already people working to rebuild it, even some other former Fairy Tail members, but Hisui  _ really _ wanted Levy to be involved. She planned to give the script mage the highest position she could. 

Laura McGarden continued to chatter away, but none of them were listening to her, merely nodding or humming when she paused and it seemed appropriate. 

Yukino was tense beside her, and her hands still hadn’t left her keys. Hisui knew Gajeel wouldn’t actually attack them. Not here, in front of Levy’s family. Really, he probably wouldn’t anywhere. He just wanted to make sure they knew he didn’t approve of them being here. But Yukino took her duties as Hisui’s bodyguard very seriously, so there was no point in telling her not to bother with him. 

Though Hisui did wish that Levy would get back and end this horrible tension. According to what she heard, she was one of the few people that Gajeel actually listened to. Unfortunately… it was likely that the iron dragon slayer wouldn’t want to be separated from her, which meant… 

Hisui took a deep breath. “Gajeel, would you like a position on the Magic Council as well?” He’d basically be in the place of a Rune Knight, nowhere near the rank of Levy, or even Bisca, Laki, and Kinana, but maybe offering him the position would be enough to convince him to stop being so hostile. 

Gajeel threw his head back and laughed. “Seriously? You seriously think I’d join that mess? No way in hell!” 

Hisui took a slow sip from her tea. “So you won’t even entertain the idea? Even if Levy agrees to work with us?” 

He crossed his arms. “No, I won’t.” 

Hisui sighed. “So I assume that means you don’t want Levy to come work for us.” 

“Nah, if anyone could fix the stupid Council, it’d be her. I told her to do whatever she wanted when she asked me about it,” he said. “I just don’t want you pressurin’ her into something she doesn't actually wanna do.” 

Hisui exchanged a glance with Yukino. “So then why won’t you come work for us, too?” Yukino asked. 

“Got better things to do,” he said. “And fuck the government.” 

Laura sighed and shook her head, but didn’t bother scolding Gajeel again, though he did wince as soon as he realized what he’d said. 

“Lily should be gettin’ out here soon anyways,” he continued. “Think we’ve worked out some plans on what to do next, with or without Levy, if she decides she wants to work for you bastards.” 

Yukino narrowed her eyes. “And what plans would those be?” 

“None of yer damn business,” Gajeel said. 

Hisui sighed and shook her head. She’d wondered if the Fairy Tail members might mellow out once they were no longer a guild, but it seemed that that wasn’t the case. Not that Hisui necessarily  _ wanted _ them to. She had admired the guild and all its wizards, and she had been saddened to hear what had happened to them. But she also had to look at it from a different perspective. A guild full of insanely powerful wizards who rarely did what they were told could cause issues down the line, and now that they  _ weren’t _ a guild, it could mean a new era for the way that the government interacted with guilds as a whole. 

“Mom! Gajeel! We’re back!” 

Hisui sagged in her seat as soon as she heard Levy’s voice. Now that she was here, hopefully they could get the rest of this visit over fairly quickly. 

“Levy!” Laura practically sprinted out of the kitchen. “You have some guests. June, come with me and bring the girls outside. It sounds important, let’s give them a moment.” 

“Oh?” Levy crept into the kitchen, and immediately sighed when she saw Hisui and Yukino sitting at the kitchen table. “Hello, Princess Hisui, Yukino.” 

“I assume you know why we’re here,” Hisui said. 

Levy took a seat next to Gajeel. “Yes, you want to recruit me. I got your letters, you know. I even sent one back, asking you to give me a couple weeks to decide, and I’d really prefer that you not get my family involved in this. I work hard not to worry them, you know.” 

Hisui shifted uncomfortably. Admittedly, she hadn’t thought about that. Levy’s family clearly didn’t have any other wizards in it, and as such, they probably didn’t keep up with the magical side of Fiore much. 

“Well, you’ve had your few weeks,” Hisui said, though she sounded much more meek than before. “We do need an answer as soon as possible.” 

Levy crossed her arms. “Look, it’s not that I don’t  _ want _ to. I have a lot of ideas on how you could improve the Council. But after everything that happened…” She shot Gajeel a glance. “I don’t want to just leave like that.” 

“I told you, you weren’t gonna turn down somethin’ you wanna do because of me,” Gajeel said. “I can do just fine on my own. And I won’t even be on my own. I’ll have Lily once he gets his ass here.” 

Levy took a deep breath. “Three more days, alright? Just give me three more days, and then I promise I’ll give you my answer.” 

“Fine.” Hisui took the last sip of her tea, and stood up. “I can give you that. Come on, Yukino. We’ve bothered them enough. Let’s get out of here.” 

* * *

Gray never thought he’d be back in Isvan like this. Ever since he’d joined Fairy Tail, he’d told himself he needed to come back, visit, build a memorial for his parents. Maybe he’d even bring Natsu and Erza. But he’d just never done it. It kept getting pushed back, more pressing matters always taking up his time. 

But now that he’d come back here… 

He wished he hadn’t. 

There was  _ nothing _ left. The ruins were buried beneath ice and snow. It was a barren wasteland. 

Juvia silently tailed after him as he wandered through what little remained. He knew she was trying to be respectful, give him his space, and he appreciated it. Honestly, he didn’t even know what he might say to her if she tried to talk to him, to ask if he was okay. But he was glad she was here. Just knowing that she was nearby, someone to fall back on if he needed it, it did make this a little easier. 

Thanks to his father’s memorial, finding his old house, or what remained of it, was a little easier. Silver had found it beforehand and made the memorial just outside it. Gray didn’t expect to find anything in its remains. What hadn’t been destroyed would have been ruined by the elements, or possibly even stolen if any bandits had come out this way after they heard about Isvan’s destruction. But that being said… he couldn’t help but try and sift through all the rubble. Maybe some old clothes? Some little knick knacks? Hell, he’d take a piece of silverware. Anything to keep as a reminder. 

“Do you want me to help?” Juvia asked, standing just outside the house’s ruins. 

Gray shrugged. “You can if you want.” He didn’t care either way. “There’s probably not actually anything here though… We can head out to Ur’s tomorrow morning.” 

“Sure, if you want to leave so soon.” Juvia stepped around the rubble, and began to help him dust what snow they could away, overturn hunks of debris. 

“I mean, even if I wanted to stay longer, it’s not like there’s any shelter or food out here. We’re going to have a hell of a walk back to the village tonight anyways,” he said. 

Juvia hummed, but didn’t respond further than that. 

Gray didn’t know how much time they spent digging through the remains of his house, but he was about to give up. He’d  _ known _ there would be nothing here. Why had he wasted time doing this? 

“Hey.” Juvia grunted, and shoved aside a particularly large hunk of rubble. “I think I found something.” She let the debris fall to the side, and kneeled down to pick the object up. “Wow, it’s a book! I can’t believe it survived all this time out here like this.” 

“Huh?” Gray stepped over, and took it from her. He didn’t remember his family owning very many books. None of them had been very avid readers. 

Juvia peered over his shoulder as he opened it and flipped through the pages. “Oh… Most of it’s in Isvanian.” 

She pointed to the pages. “It’s handwritten, too. Some kind of diary?” 

“I guess so.” Gray sighed and shook his head. “Kind of useless, though. I barely remember any Isvanian.” 

“I’m sure we could find someone to translate it,” Juvia said. “Especially in one of the nearby villages.” 

“I…” Gray stared down at the pages. He hadn’t really spoken or read any Isvanian since he was a kid, and even then, most people in the village had spoken Fioran, so it wasn’t super important that he was fluent in the language in the first place. When Ur had taken him in, she spoke to him in Isvanian on occasion, but after he joined Fairy Tail, no one else had known the language. It hadn’t taken long for Gray to forget most of what he knew, since he never used it. After he’d gotten older, he’d wished that he’d continued to practice the language, but there wasn’t anything he could do about it now. “Maybe I could translate at least some of it, if I  _ really _ tried. I don’t know if I want to ask someone I don’t know…” 

Juvia frowned in thought. “Could we contact Levy? She’s good with languages, isn’t she? Or Freed?” 

“I guess that’s an option,” he said. “It would take a while though.” He flipped through a few more pages, stopping on one that had his father’s signature on it, proving that this diary had belonged to his family. “But I guess that’s really all we can do.” 

Juvia nodded. “We’ll do that. As soon as we get back in town, we can write to them. Freed’s with Blue Pegasus, isn’t he? And Levy… she went to her parents’ with Gajeel.” 

“Yeah…” Gray tucked the journal into his pocket. “We’ll just do that, and I’ll work on translating anything of it I can. Or maybe something in Ur’s old home will help, since she knew the language too.” 

“Right,” Juvia said. 

Gray sighed. “Come on, let’s head back to that other village. Maybe we can get there before dark.” 

* * *

“You want to run off to some random coordinates to look for some bullshit books about Faeries, because an  _ illusion _ told you to?” Angel scoffed. “You’re lucky you’re as gorgeous as you are, Erza. People sure don’t like you for your mind.” 

“Angel,” Jellal growled. 

She shrugged. “I’m just being honest.” 

“Master Mavis isn’t actually an illusion,” Erza argued. “She’s a ghost. Besides, this is important! Not just for me, but Jellal is connected to Faeries too! That marking on his face proves that!” 

“I thought you two just got matching face tattoos,” Cobra said. “Seems like the kinda shit you’d do.” 

Erza nearly groaned in frustration, and cursed herself for not waiting to bring this up when it was just with Jellal and Meredy. She really didn’t need the Oracion Seis’s opinions on all of this. 

Jellal inspected the slip of paper with the coordinates on it again. “You really think this will have the information you want?” 

Erza nodded. “I  _ know _ it will.” 

Jellal turned to Meredy. “Do you think you would do alright without us for a week or two? I’m sure with them, you could even take down a couple small dark guilds.” 

Meredy sighed and tossed another log into the fire. “I’m not going to stop you from doing this. Just try to be careful. If you end up in somewhere like Crocus looking—” 

“We won’t,” Erza said. She’d checked. The coordinates led out into the wilderness. 

“You have to remember, Erza.” Meredy pointed to her shoulder. “You bear the Crime Sorciere emblem now. Chances are, that alone could get you arrested, so it’s not just Jellal that needs to be careful.” 

Erza glanced down at her new guildmark. She hadn’t gotten rid of the Fairy Tail one. How  _ could _ she? No, she’d had her Crime Sorciere mark placed on her opposite shoulder. But Meredy was right. That mark alone would probably be enough to damn her in the eyes of the law. “I promise we’ll be careful,” she assured Meredy. “Nothing will happen to us.” 

“Take Cobra and Midnight with you,” she requested. “That will make me feel a little better.” 

“Ah, seriously?” Cobra complained. 

Midnight sighed. “I don’t care about this, do I  _ have _ to go?” 

_ “Yes,” _ Meredy hissed. 

They groaned and fell against Cobra. “Fine.” 

Personally, Erza didn’t want them to come either, but given everything Meredy had lost, she couldn’t find it in her to protest. She was just being overly cautious, since she couldn’t justify the entire guild going to search for Mavis’s books. Especially considering it was a personal matter to Erza. 

“We’ll head out in a few days,” Jellal said. “After we finish with this job.” 

Erza nodded. “Sounds good.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gajeel subconsciously deciding that Levy's mom is his mom and acting accordingly but not realizing it is so fucking funny to me. Just because he's never had a mom before doesn't mean he's not immune to mom powers


	3. Can't Move On

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucy and Loke want to help Cana, Lisanna has a conversation with Milliana, Sting struggles with being the guildmaster, and Levy realizes the lasting damages of Tartaros

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for panic attacks in this chapter, more details in the end note

“Have we tried bandages yet?” 

“Yeah, she just peeled them right off.” 

“Maybe if we pin them together, rather than just wrapping them?” 

“I don’t see how that would help. She scratched herself until she bled through long sleeves, she’ll probably just scratch through them.” 

“Fuck…” 

“Besides, you know it’s not just on her arm, it’s her shoulder and head, too.” 

“I know! I know, I just… I hate that I can’t help her… I don’t know what to do.” 

“I’m sorry, babe, I know. Trust me, I understand.” 

Cana sighed, and buried her head further beneath the pillows. She didn’t want to hear this, didn’t want to listen to Loke and Lucy desperately trying to come up with some way to help her. Some way to stop her from accidentally mutilating herself. 

“Cana, sweetheart, you awake?” 

Cana groaned and rolled over, pulling the blankets over with her. “Yeah, guess I am now. Did I pass out again?” 

The bed dipped as Lucy sat down next to her. “Is it okay if I touch you? I can do it on the opposite side. I don’t want to set you off again…” 

“Ah, come on.” She sat up. “I ain’t that fragile.” 

Lucy glanced back at Loke, her brows pinched together in concern. “Cana, you hyperventilated this time. I’ve never seen you so freaked out.” 

Cana sighed. She knew that. That was the last thing she  _ did _ remember. Her breathing coming out in panicked gasps, as Lucy and Loke desperately tried to console her and get her calmed down  _ before _ she passed out. Looks like they hadn’t been successful. 

“Do you… Do you want to talk about it?” her girlfriend asked. 

“What’s there to talk about?” she asked with a shrug. “My skin felt all tight and wrong again, the runes itched. I mean, yeah, it got a little worse this time, but I’ll be fine.” 

“Loke thinks we should take you to get stitches,” she said. 

“What, seriously?” Cana whipped around to stare at their boyfriend. “I do not need stitches!” 

“You’re still bleeding,” he said, gesturing to her arm. 

She glanced down, and sure enough, blood still trickled from between the bandages that had been hastily wrapped around her arm and shoulder, and now that she was focusing on it, she realized she could feel blood matting her hair down. “Dammit…” 

“I think you should talk to a healer anyways, about this…” he continued. 

“Oh come on!” Cana complained. “Don’t start with that! What the hell would they even be able to  _ do _ about this?” 

“I don’t know!” Loke marched over to sit on her opposite side. “But… but maybe it’s some PTSD response or something. Tartaros was… it was rough for everyone.” 

“It’s not a trauma response!” she argued. And it  _ wasn’t; _ Cana was sure of it. “What I went through in Tartaros wasn’t even anything! Compared to everyone else—” She scoffed and shook her head. 

“Cana, please take this seriously,” Lucy said. “It’s been over a month now, and these fits are just getting worse. They started right after Tartaros, I don’t know what else it could possibly be. And just because you supposedly didn’t go through as much as everyone else, doesn’t mean that you might not…” 

“Might not what?” Cana drawled. “Be traumatized?” 

Lucy squeaked and looked away, and Cana immediately felt guilty for taking that tone with her, for brushing off her concerns without offering any real explanations for why she was so certain that wasn’t the case. 

“Cana, we just want to help,” Loke said. “That’s all. We don’t mean to make you feel bad, or anything like that. We just don’t like seeing you hurting like this.” 

“It has nothing to do with Tartaros,” she murmured, pulling her knees to her chest to rest her chin on them. “I promise, it’s… I think it’s just the runes.” She curled up tighter. “I was a fucking idiot, and didn’t listen to anyone about not using that spell, and it caught up with me.” 

“What?” Lucy asked. “Cana, what do you mean?” 

“I’m never thinking about Tartaros when a fit starts, just that my body feels wrong, not like my own, and it all stems from the runes,” she explained. “I just… I don’t know, it freaks me out, and then I start scratching, and it just… it spirals from there. It’s not exactly a panic attack, I don’t think, or any kind of trauma response. I don’t know what could possibly be done about this. The Fairy Glitter spell just finally decided to bite me in the ass.” 

“Well then we need to talk to experts,” Loke said. “Lucy, why don’t you talk to Yukino? She seemed to like us, didn’t she? And she works for the Princess right here in Crocus, right?” 

Lucy hummed. “Well, I guess it’s worth a shot.” 

“What the hell would she know about this?” Cana asked. 

Loke shook his head. “She probably doesn’t know anything. But she probably has connections, and maybe they’ll lead to something.” 

“I don’t think it’ll matter,” Cana said. “I think it’s just something I’m going to have to get used to.” 

“Cana, we at least have to  _ try,” _ Lucy said. “Especially if these attacks keep getting worse. You’re already having them weekly. You can’t function like this. You had one at work the other night!” 

“I just work at a shitty bar, it doesn’t matter. Besides, Loke was there and caught me,” she said. 

“It’s not like you’ll have every shift together!” Lucy argued. “Look, babe, even if you think it’s useless, we’re still going to try.” 

“Fine, I mean, it’s not like I can stop you.” She uncurled and fell backwards. Even if she thought it was completely useless. 

* * *

Even after being a part of Mermaid Heel for a month now, Lisanna had yet to get used to the sea air. Not that she wanted to, it really was lovely, and she wanted that soothing awe to stay with her for as long as possible. She’d never once been interested in living on the coast, but now she decided the beach was one of her favorite places. 

“Wow, you’re up early. You and Mira normally sleep in, don’t you?” Milliana pranced over and fell next to Lisanna, crossing her legs and flicking her tail in contentment. 

“Ah, couldn’t sleep,” the takeover mage said, keeping her gaze on the ocean. “Thought I’d go for a walk. I’ve only actually been down here to the beach a few times since we moved here. What about you? What are you doing out here so early?” 

“Kagura likes to go running in the mornings,” she said with a smile. “It’s part of her morning workout routine. After this she’ll go lift weights probably.” 

Lisanna smiled. “Maybe she should talk to Mira. She used to workout with Erza, maybe she’d like the new partner. I can never keep up with her.” 

Milliana snickered. “You and me both. I’ve been trying to match Kagura for years now. I just don’t think I’m built for it.” 

“Well, you’re more of a speed fighter, aren’t you? You don’t really need this kind of stuff,” she said. Lisanna was in pretty much the same situation. When she was younger, she’d tried to match the training routine everyone else had, but she’d never really bulked up like anyone else. Physical strength wasn’t exactly her thing. 

Milliana leaned back and rested her weight on the palms of her hands. “True, I rely on my agility, but I still want to improve. It’s bitten me in the ass a few times, so I want to get better. Which is why I try and keep up with Kagura.” 

“Hm…” Lisanna began to trace patterns in the sand. “Do you think… Kagura would train me if I asked her?” 

Milliana’s ears pricked up. “Oh yeah, sure. Kagura will train anyone who asks her. Most only last about a week before they quit though.” 

“Oh really?” Lisanna couldn’t help but smirk. She’d lasted five months under Erza’s training before, not to mention Lucy Ashley’s back in Edolas, and she was pretty sure either of those would actually kill the average person. “I think I could handle it.”  _ At least for a little while. _

“I can ask her, if you want,” she said with a shrug. “But… why would you even want something like that? You’re powerful enough as it is, I think. And why don’t you ask your sister? She’s on about the same level as Kagura, isn’t she?” 

Lisanna took a deep breath. The truth was, she felt like she’d been too useless. Not just during the Tartaros battle, but every time before that. How had she actually managed to help during the Eclipse Gate nightmare? She hadn’t been chosen to fight in the Grand Magic Games, she’d been captured immediately on Tenrou. Hell, she’d been too much of a coward to even try and help in any meaningful way back in Edolas. “I just want to get stronger.” 

_ If I had been stronger, maybe I could have helped everyone. Maybe we wouldn’t have had to separate. Maybe Natsu wouldn’t have…  _

“And I know Mira won’t push me like I actually need to be pushed,” she continued. “She’ll be way too soft on me, and I don’t think that would be an issue for Kagura.” 

Milliana giggled. “Oh, most definitely not. But yeah, I’ll talk to her.” She stood back up, and flicked the sand out of her tail. “I should go catch up with her, or she’ll have my hide.” 

“Hm.” Lisanna smiled. Milliana and Kagura really were good for each other. “Yeah, thanks, Milliana.” 

“No problem!” 

* * *

_ “Uuuhhhhhnnnn!” _

“Shut up, Sting,” Rogue grumbled. “Just sign the damn papers.” 

Sting flopped down against the desk, knocking over a pile of papers and files, before glaring up at his brother.  _ “You _ sign the damn papers.” 

“I’m not the guildmaster,” Rogue reminded him, though he was already moving to tidy the documents back up. “Speaking of which, Rufus needs to have a meeting with you, about a quest that needs approval from the guildmaster.” 

“Why the hell does he need approval from the guildmaster?” Sting whined. He was so sick of  _ meetings. _ Why did so many things require meetings? Couldn’t people just do shit without them? Why did they need to  _ talk _ so much beforehand? 

“Because it’s a dangerous job, remember when we had to talk to Jiemma before certain jobs?” he said. “It’s like that.” 

“I fucking hate this.” Sting signed a paper, ready to take a break, but Rogue was already setting more down in front of him. 

“I know, and I’m sorry, but someone has to do it,” he said. 

“Yeah, and why the hell can’t someone else do it? Why the hell can’t  _ you _ do it?” Sting asked. 

Rogue sighed. “Because I have unstable magic and unstable tendencies. It’s not worth the risk.” 

“Please, we stopped all that,” Sting argued. “It’s not like you’re actually going to go dark side.” 

“We stopped  _ that _ time,” Rogue said. “But we should still be cautious. Skiadrum told me my magic would probably never be completely stable, so we can’t just let our guard down. I’m not saying I like it, I wish I could take this job from you… for a number of reasons—” 

“Why do I get the feeling that was an insult?” Sting interrupted. 

“But I can’t,” Rogue said, not bothering to actually respond to him, though he did roll his eyes. “That’s just the way it is.” 

“Yeah, but why can’t we get someone else to? What about Rufus? He seems like he’d be good at this kind of shit!” Sure, technically the entire Sabertooth guild had made the decision to put Sting in charge, but surely they could do something to change their minds. Literally  _ anyone _ would be better at this job than him. At this rate, Sting gave the guild another year before he ran it into the ground, and he was only giving it that long because Rogue was helping him and doing as much of the job as he could for him. 

“We can try to talk to him, but you really shouldn’t get your hopes up,” Rogue said. 

“Too late! They’re already up! I’ll bully someone into taking the position if I have to,” he said. “I’m done with this bullshit! Done! If I have to fill out one more form, I’m killing myself!” 

Rogue dropped another file in front of him. “Orga destroyed three buildings yesterday.” 

Sting snarled. “I fucking hate you.” 

* * *

“Careful, girls!” June said. “He’s not a toy!” 

“Nah, s’fine, June,” Gajeel assured her, though he did wince as a lock of his hair was yanked on. 

June sighed and shook her head, but relaxed against the couch once more, and resumed her conversation with Levy and their father. 

“How come you never fly?” Ellie asked as she poked at Gajeel’s wing. “Flying would be fun!” 

“Don’t know how,” he admitted. He was sure he could figure it out, if he really tried, His instincts would probably kick in, and it’d be pretty easy after that. But he hadn’t wanted to try. It’d taken a while for the wings to stop being so sore, and for his balance to get back to normal. Besides, it had taken Natsu months to learn how to fly reliably, and he’d had Mirajane to help teach him. 

Maybe he could ask Pantherlily when he got back from looking for Natsu and Happy… Yeah, he’d do that. Because it wasn’t like he could avoid flying forever, and he had the wings now, might as well make them useful. 

“Awww,” Ellie pouted. “How can you not know?” 

“Well I didn’t always have ‘em. Actually…” He grinned and poked Ellie in the chest. “I used to look just like you.” 

She squeaked, and stumbled back a step. “I want cool wings! That’s not fair! How’d you get them!? I want some! I want some!” 

Gajeel’s shoulders shook with laughter. “Yeah, if I ever find out how you could get some, I’ll let ya know.” 

“Gajeel!” Marie tightened her hold on his hand. She was trying to paint his claws black, to match the rest of his clothes, apparently. “You’re moving too much! Don’t move, if you move, I mess up.” She shook her head and resumed her work. “You can’t move.” 

_ You can’t move.  _

His entire body tensed. 

_ Don’t move. _

Panic raced through him. 

_ I can’t move. _

* * *

Had Levy not known Gajeel as well as she did, she doubted she would have caught it. The exact moment he began to panic, and then she realized what Marie had just said. “Shit.” 

Every muscle in Gajeel’s body tensed, and his eyes grew unfocused. It wasn’t the first time she’d watched someone fall into a panic attack or something similar, but she had never seen this happen to  _ Gajeel. _ She had no idea how he would react, if he would lash out. She knew he’d never forgive himself if he accidentally harmed someone in her family. 

She jumped to her feet, startling her sister, and sprinted towards him. “Girls, get back, now,” she commanded. “June, take them outside. Mom, Dad, go with them.” 

Gajeel’s breathing began to deepen, and iron creeped down his arms. 

“What? Levy, what are you talking—?” her mother began. 

Levy yanked the girls back from Gajeel and shoved them in June’s direction. “Now! Please! I’ll explain in a minute!” But now that Marie and Ellie were away from Gajeel, she didn’t bother to make sure they actually left. She had more important things to take care of. “Hey, Gajeel. Can you hear me?” She did her best to keep her voice calm, soft, not wanting to make it any worse. 

His claws dug into his thighs. Blood soaked into his pants and dripped onto the floor. 

“Gajeel? Can I touch you?” She kneeled next to him, desperately wanting to snap him out of this as quickly as she could, for everyone’s sakes, and touch was always the easiest way to ground Gajeel, but given what was probably running through his head, she wasn’t sure that was a good idea. 

“Can’t move…” he murmured between panicked gasps. “I… I can’t—” 

“Gajeel, listen to me.” She maneuvered around so that she was facing him. “It’s me, it’s Levy. You’re with me, you’re safe.” Slowly, gently, she tipped his chin up so he could see her. “Look, it’s me. You’re not in the lab. Seilah isn’t here. I promise.” 

He flinched, and by now, the iron was creeping up his jaw. 

Levy’s frown deepened, as she tried to come up with some way to prove to him that he wasn’t under that demon’s curse. She just had to prove that he  _ could _ move, that his body was his own, and no one had locked him inside it. 

“Look, look.” She took his hand, removing his claws from his own skin, and intertwined their fingers. “You’re holding my hand, aren’t you?” His fingers had instinctively curled into her own. “You moved your fingers. You can move.” 

Slowly, agonizingly slowly, awareness and focus began to shine in his eyes again. 

“There we go.” Levy smiled, and reached out to hold the back of his head, and guide him forward so she could press his face into the crook of her neck. “I’m holding your hand, you moved your fingers, you can smell me. I’m right here. It’s me, it’s Levy.  _ Not _ Seilah.” 

She could feel his panicked breath against her skin, but he took in a deep breath, sniffing at her and nuzzling against her. 

“I’ve got you,” she promised him, softly petting his tangled hair. “I’ve got you.” 

He slumped against her, his entire body going limp. 

“Ah!” Levy fell backwards, not expecting the sudden weight, but she quickly readjusted herself so she could support him. “You back with me?” 

“Fuck…” Gajeel wrapped his arms around her, squeezing in a desperate hug.  _ “Fuck.” _

“It’s okay,” she said. “You’re okay.” Relief coursed through her as she realized he was back to himself. “Do you wanna talk? Or do you just want… I sent my family outside. I can take you to the bedroom, let them know everything is okay, and then I’ll come sit with you?” 

“Oh gods.” His claws pricked at her skin. “I didn’t hurt any of ‘em, did I?” 

“No, no, of course not,” she assured him. “You froze up, and maybe you might have had a panic attack if I didn’t catch it so quick, but you never even acted like you might have hurt anyone.” 

“Good. That’s— That’s good,” he said, though his voice shook. 

“Mmhm.” Levy rubbed her cheek against him, wanting to comfort him in any way she could. “Was this the first time this has happened? Since… Since Tartaros?” 

“Had some nightmares…” he admitted. “First time anything like that… Shit.” He finally let go of her and fell back. “Stupid bitch fucked me up, didn’t she?” He laughed bitterly and drug his hand down his face. “Gods, I  _ wish _ I’d gotten the chance to tear her to fuckin’ shreds,” he snarled. “Mira gets all the goddamn fun.” 

“What actually happened?” she asked. “If you want to talk about it. We don’t have to do it right now.” 

“Nah, it’s…” He shook his head. “I don’t know, she just said I couldn’t move, and then it was like I really  _ couldn’t. _ I think I knew it was all my fucked up head, but I couldn’t really… It’s not like I could actually  _ see _ Seilah, or hear her or anythin’ like that. I don’t know, just got freaked out. But thanks fer…” He vaguely gestured to her. “Calmin’ me down, before I  _ really _ freaked out.” 

“Of course, Gajeel,” she said. “And I’ll talk to my family, let them know not to… say anything like that again.” 

“This is fucking stupid,” he grumbled. 

“I’m sorry.” 

“It ain’t like it’s  _ y’er _ fault,” he said. “I just…” 

“Yeah, I know.” Honestly, Levy had been expecting something like this to happen. Everything Gajeel had gone through would have been enough to traumatize anyone, and Gajeel’s way of dealing with those types of things, which was just ignoring them, was bound to make it even worse. 

“I wanna go to bed,” he said. “Need a fucking nap.” 

“Y-Yeah…” Levy hoped her concern and worry didn’t show on her face. That was the last thing Gajeel would want right now, but… that was an unusual reaction from him. “What do you want me to tell my family?” 

“What do you mean? Whatever you wanna tell them,” he said. “The truth, watered down version of the truth, some absolute bullshit. I don’t give a damn.” 

He probably did. He probably wouldn’t want them to know anything that would make them  _ pity _ him, but Gajeel would  _ never _ admit that. “Water down version of the truth it is,” she decided. “I’ll go fill them in, and then I’ll come lay down with you, alright?” 

“Yeah, alright.” He shuffled down the hallway towards the guest room where they’d been sleeping. 

Levy took a deep breath, hoping there hadn’t been a better way she could have handled that, and began to feel guilty over the fact that she was… most likely going to end up joining the Council and leaving him. He shouldn’t be alone right now. He needed all the support he could get, especially with Natsu, Wendy, and Juvia gone. 

She shook her head. She could worry about that later. Right now, she needed to deal with her family. So she steeled herself, and headed outside. 

“Levy, Levy, is he okay?” her mother demanded the second she stepped out the door. “Are  _ you _ okay? Was that—” 

“Mom, calm down.” Levy gave her what she hoped was a reassuring smile. “Where are the girls?” 

“They’re playing in the backyard,” June said. “But I made sure they know not to go back in. What was that?” 

“Look, I’m sure you know by now that guild wizards’ lives aren’t… exactly easy,” she began. “And Gajeel… he’s had a particularly hard life.” 

“He had a panic attack, didn’t he?” her father asked. “What triggered it?” 

“The girls,” she said. 

“The  _ girls?” _ June demanded, her eyes wide with worry. “Have they been bothering him this whole time? Gods, you should have told me! We can go back home—” 

“No, no!” Levy hurried to interrupt. “Not the girls themselves. It was when Marie told him he couldn’t move. We’ll just have to make sure they don’t do that again.” 

Her mother fell back into her rocking chair. “Poor boy. I… I suspected that he… I mean, he’s covered in all those awful scars…” She shook her head. “But I didn’t want to ask.” 

“Most of the scars on his arms are pretty old,” Levy said. “From old jobs.”  _ Back when he was with Phantom Lord. _ “The one on his face is a burn from his younger brother.” 

“What…?” June asked. 

Levy waved her off. “Long story. But he doesn’t really care about any of those. He’d probably tell you in excruciating detail what he got them from if he asked. But the ones on his back and hand… those are…” She sighed. “The truth is, in that last battle, this curse was used on him, and it made it so that he couldn't move at all, couldn't speak, or anything, and he ended up captured and tortured, and it was because of that that this happened.” 

“Oh!” June covered her mouth with her hands. 

“Gods…” Her father frowned and shook his head. 

“The best thing you can do to help is to just not treat him any differently,” Levy told them. “He doesn’t do well with pity, or really even concern unless it’s from very specific people.” 

“Like you?” her mother asked. 

“Me, his siblings, Juvia and Lily,” she said. “He’ll also probably get a little distant after… this. Please don’t take it personally.” 

“Of course not, dear!” her mother exclaimed. 

“Yeah, and I’ll talk to the girls,” June said. “Tell them they need to be more careful about what they say to him.” 

Levy smiled. “Thanks.” 

June nodded, and went around back to find her kids, and her mother went back inside to get started on dinner, likely just wanting something to do with her hands after that. She’d always been that way. Levy was just about to follow and go check on Gajeel again, when her father stopped her. “Hey, Levy?” 

“Hm?” She glanced over her shoulder at him. 

He leaned against the railing of the porch. “You love that man, don’t you?” 

Levy blushed, but she knew there was no denying it. She was surprised no one else in her family had confronted her about it already. “Yeah, I do.” 

“Yeah, I thought so,” he said with a smile. “And I think he loves you, too.” 

“Yeah, maybe.” It was obvious Gajeel cared deeply for her, there was no denying that. But she had no idea the exact way he did care for her. “But now isn’t the time for that kind of thing, for either one of us.” 

“Ha.” He shook his head. “I don’t know about that. Just take good care of him, alright? He tries to act tough, but he’s a big ‘ol softie. You better be nice to him.” 

“Do you guys already like him more than me?” she asked with a smirk. “And I’m always nice to him! He’s the mean one!” 

He chuckled. “Whatever you say, sweetheart.” 

Levy rolled her eyes, and went back inside to check on Gajeel. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first section in Cana's POV has discussions about previous breakdowns, but no actual scene of it. During Gajeel's POV he starts to have one, and then it switches to Levy's POV while she tries to help him through it. 
> 
> Anyways, Levy's family is full of saints, which is why she's the way that she is. Also three guesses for who Sting ropes into being the guildmaster (because he is NOT staying in that position, no way in hell lmao I always thought that was so stupid, he'd hate that, and be bad at it).


	4. Sticky Blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gajeel and Levy depart, Erza begins the quest for Mavis's books, and Natsu has a breakdown.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heads up for Natsu's POV, there's a graphic gore and self harm warning!

“Gods above, darling! Your hair is a mess! Has no one ever taught you how to take care of it?” Sherry questioned. She tugged the comb through Wendy’s hair, rough enough to get through most of the tangles, but not so rough that it was unbearable pain. Though Wendy did wince every once in a while. 

“I… I thought I was doing okay…” Wendy murmured quietly, beginning to blush as embarrassment swept over her. She liked her long hair, but Sherry was right about no one ever really teaching her what to do with it. The only reason she even knew how to put it in a ponytail was because Mirajane had taught her when she was little. She’d never learned how to braid it, or cut it, or anything like that. 

“Your ends are horrible!” Sherry exclaimed. “Is it okay if I give it a trim? Not enough to be noticeable! But your hair will feel so much healthier, and the ends won’t get so frizzy either.” 

Wendy fidgeted in her seat. “You… you want to cut it?” 

“Only if you want me to. I won’t do anything you’re not comfortable with,” Sherry assured her. 

Wendy hummed, and tapped her claws against her thighs. “What do you think, Chelia?” 

In the seat across from her, Chelia perked up, offering Wendy a bright smile. “Whatever you want to do!” She twirled her own hair around her finger. “But Sherry is the one who always does my hair, so it’ll look good either way!” 

“Mm… okay…” Wendy said. 

“I don’t want you to feel like I’m pressuring you,” Sherry hurried to say, sensing her hesitation. 

“No, no, it’s not that!” Wendy said. “It’s just that… well…” Her wings fluttered and pressed closer to her body. “I’ve never had a haircut before…” 

_ “What!?” _ Chelia and Sherry exclaimed. 

Wendy ducked her head, her ears twitching. 

“Oh, I’m sorry!” Chelia said, jumping out of her seat. “I didn’t mean to get too loud.” 

“No, you’re okay,” Wendy said, picking at the scales and fur on her wrists. “It doesn’t actually bother me, my ears just twitch. And no, I’ve never had one. Obviously the dragons couldn’t cut my hair… and then I just never thought about it, so I never asked anyone in Fairy Tail to cut it either.” Not to mention, Natsu’s aversion to haircuts kind of put her off of it. When they’d first come to Fairy Tail, and Erza had insisted on cutting her brother’s shaggy hair, he’d thrown a fit, and she’d had to sit on top of him to hold him still while she cut his hair. 

“Oh, well in that case, time for your first haircut!” Sherry said. “I’ll make it really quick, and just a little trim. Honestly you might not even notice.” 

“Okay!” Wendy could admit she was a little excited, now that she was thinking about it. “Trim away!” 

“Will do! Oh, what about your fur?” she asked. “Should I trim it? Or anything like that?” 

“Uh…” Wendy reached up and brushed the fur on her shoulders. “No, I think it’ll be okay.” At least, she  _ hoped _ it never got long enough that she’d need to trim it. She hadn’t  _ noticed _ it really growing though, so she didn’t think that would ever happen. 

“Alrighty, then!” Sherry leaned over to grab some scissors off the table. “Let’s get started.” 

Wendy took a deep breath, and straightened up. “Right! My first haircut!” 

Sherry got to work trimming off the ends of her hair, and Chelia crept over to watch her cousin work more closely. 

Despite being at Lamia Scale for several weeks now, Wendy was still so surprised by how easily everyone had accepted her, all things considered. Not just Chelia and Sherry either, Lyon was quick to take her in, always keeping a close eye on her and accompanying her on jobs whenever he could. The rest of the guild was always very nice to her as well. The townsfolk could be a little wary of her, but Wendy tried not to let it get to her, especially because everyone in the guild was always so nice. 

It certainly wasn’t Fairy Tail, and Wendy missed everyone dearly… 

But given enough time, she was certain she could make a home here. 

* * *

“You all packed up? You’re not forgetting anything important, right?” 

Levy sighed and shook her head, readjusting the bag on her shoulder. “I’m sure, Mom. We’ve combed through the entire house. And even if we did forget something, you can always just mail it to Crocus.” 

“Well, what about you, Gajeel?” her mother asked. “If I find anything of yours, where should I send it? You’re not going to Crocus, are you?” 

“Nah, just send it to Levy.” Though he knew for sure he wasn’t forgetting anything. All he had were a few changes of clothes. 

“If you’re sure…” Laura said. “I wish you two could stay longer.” 

“I know, but I promised the Princess my answer,” Levy said. “And as soon as she knows I’m going to join the Council, she’ll want me to start immediately, so I really do need to get to Crocus. Plus, that’s where Lucy, Loke, and Cana are living now. And Laki, Kinana, Alzack, and Bisca! So I’ll get to catch up with all of them.” 

Gajeel tried not to grimace. He was glad Levy would have so many people she knew so close, it made him feel a lot better about separating, but given what he was doing, he wouldn’t have anyone. 

Well… besides Pantherlily. The Exceed had finally returned from searching for Natsu and Happy a couple days ago (without a single lead to their whereabouts, unfortunately), so at least Gajeel would have him. 

“Be sure to let us know when you get there,” Levy’s father said. “And you, too, Gajeel.” 

“Uh…” Gajeel glanced down at Pantherlily, who merely shook his head, as if to say,  _ This is your problem.  _

“I ain’t exactly gonna have a home address or anything,” he said. 

“Oh…” Laura frowned. “Then where are you going?” 

“Bounty hunting,” he said. “With Lily.” 

Levy frowned, though she was quick to catch herself. She wasn’t exactly  _ thrilled _ with his choice, and his breakdown the other day probably hadn’t helped matters. But he’d be fine. Besides, bounty hunting was a great option for him. It was basically guild work but a little shadier, a little more violent, and he wouldn’t have to deal with as many people. 

“Well… alright then,” Laura said. “But you better come back and visit whenever you get the chance. And stop by to see Ellie and Marie, too.” 

“Yeah, yeah.” Gajeel waved his hand, but he did intend to come by if he was ever in the area. June had left the previous evening with the girls, and they’d been very broken up about it. “Will do.” 

Pantherlily snickered, likely remembering both girls clinging onto Gajeel and making him promise to come visit them as often as he possibly could. 

“Alright, we really should be heading out,” Levy said. “Come on.” She nudged Gajeel. “Let’s get going.” 

The dragon slayer turned on his heel, calling out a goodbye over his shoulder as he walked down the path. Levy was a little more genuine with her goodbye, and hurried to catch up to him and Pantherlily after giving them hugs. “They’re serious, you know,” she said. “They fully expect you to come visit.” 

“Yeah, I know. Guess we will if we’re around,” he said. 

“Your mother and father are lovely people, Levy,” Lily said with a curt nod. “I would rather enjoy seeing them again.” 

She chuckled. “Thanks, Lily. I’m expecting you to drag Gajeel here once or twice, if I can’t manage it myself.” 

“I said I would!” Gajeel argued, flaring his wings slightly. “If I said I would, I will!” 

“I know, you brute.” Levy shoved against him. “I’m teasing.” 

Gajeel grunted. 

“What’s got you in such a bad mood?” she asked, her eyebrows pinching together in concern. 

“Nothin,’ I’m just tired.” 

Levy hummed, like she didn’t believe him, but like hell Gajeel was going to admit that he wished they could stay longer. Not only did that mean he would get more time with Levy before they separated, but it had been nice to be in such a… stable environment. A nice environment. 

It felt like he was back at square one. Back at Phantom Lord, confused and hurt because his family had disappeared, alone, doing what he had to just to survive. Sure, he had Lily this time around, and the knowledge that there  _ were _ people out there that cared, if he bothered to go see them, but still… 

It wasn’t a pleasant feeling. 

“Well… okay,” she said. “But come on, let’s try and enjoy the trip until we get on different trains, alright?” She smiled. 

“Yeah, alright.” 

* * *

“This is in the complete opposite direction of Magnolia,” Cobra said. 

Erza readjusted her hold on the reins, slowing their horse so they were side by side with Cobra and Midnight. “Yes, so?” 

“So if these musty old books belonged to your dead master, why are they so damn far from where she lived?” he asked, before narrowing his eyes. “Or on Tenrou, if that’s where she was originally from?” 

“Stay out of my head,” Erza requested. She  _ still _ hadn’t gotten used to Cobra just  _ knowing _ things. Too many things. Not even necessarily bad things, just  _ weird _ things. Like how she liked her eggs cooked, what her favorite song was, that kind of thing. 

“It’s not like I go poking around in there, you know,” he said. “Can you just  _ stop hearing _ what I’m saying?” 

“People can stop hearing what people are saying all the time,” she pointed out. 

“What?” Midnight asked, giving her a strange look. 

“Natsu doesn’t hear what I’m saying when I’m sitting right next to him all the time,” she said. 

Jellal chuckled and pressed closer to her. 

“What?” she demanded. “What’s so funny?” 

“Oh, nothing,” he said. “I just think your dragon slayer is a different breed.” 

Erza opened her mouth to reply, but Cobra interrupted, “You didn’t answer my question. Why would your master hide old books so deep in the wilderness? We’re going to have to ride for at least a week to get to those coordinates. And there’s no towns anywhere near there.” 

Erza twisted around, trying to see the map that Jellal had, wanting to confirm Cobra’s words. 

“If you want the map, I can take the reins for a while,” Jellal said. 

“No, I’m fine.” She leaned down to pat the horse’s shoulder. As uncomfortable as it could be riding double with someone for so long, she liked having Jellal so close. They hadn’t really been able to afford four horses for this journey, so they’d had to settle for two, with Erza and Jellal taking one, and Cobra and Midnight taking the other. “But I guess it is strange… I don’t know when Master Mavis would have even had the time to come all the way out here.” 

“Could she have been interested in the ruins?” Midnight asked. 

“Oh shit.” Cobra leaned forward to rest his arms on his partner’s shoulders. “Those are out this direction?” 

Midnight nodded. “Mmhm.”

“Ruins…?” Erza asked. 

“Yeah, people say the place is cursed,” Cobra said. “Don’t know about that, but there’s some fucked up legends. Sorano did some work out there once, said the place was freaky as hell.” 

“Wait, so… you’ve been out here before?” Erza asked. “And what legends?” 

“We haven’t, Sorano had,” Midnight said. “Wish we’d have realized those ruins were at those coordinates before now… she could have gone rather than us.” 

“Do you know anything about these ruins?” she asked Jellal.

He shook his head. “No, I don’t… think so? What’s the deal with them?” 

“You really don’t know?” Midnight asked. “Weren’t you supposed to be one of Zeref’s most devout followers?” 

Jellal shifted uneasily, and Erza’s muscles began to tense up. “What does this have to do with Zeref?” he asked. 

“Supposedly… they were Zeref’s birthplace,” Midnight said, their voice as soft as ever. “And are over five hundred years old.” 

Chills raced over Erza’s body. “Zeref’s… home…?” Why the hell would Mavis hide her books there? Why the hell would she even  _ go _ there? She didn’t understand! “Why wouldn’t you say something sooner!?” she demanded. 

Midnight shrugged. “Slipped my mind, until I really started thinking about it. The Oracion Seis never had much to do with them. They were under Tartaros’s control, and while we may have technically been in a tentative alliance with the group, we weren’t going to go trespassing. Sorano only went because Brain demanded she did. She’s still never told me what for, and Erik refuses to share.” 

“It’s fucked up,” he grumbled. 

Midnight tightened their hold on the reins. “It’s unimportant now, I suppose, given that any dark guilds with any real connection to Zeref have been annihilated. Thanks to you…” they said, giving Erza a cool look, and she genuinely couldn’t tell if it was hostile or not. 

“I don’t know about that…” Jellal muttered, a dark edge creeping into his tone. “Especially given the apparent connection Zeref has to your guild.” 

“He’s not connected to Fairy Tail,” Erza protested. 

“He was spotted for the first time in over a century on your sacred land, and while it’s true you might have basically challenged Tartaros to a war… there was something strange going on there. And now your first master may have hidden important information in his birthplace.” He sighed. “Not to mention Natsu…” 

Cobra jerked back from Midnight, his eyes narrowing and flicking towards Jellal. 

Erza’s frown deepened. “What does  _ Natsu _ have to do with anything?” 

Jellal shook his head. “Nothing. It’s… Nothing.” 

It most certainly was  _ not _ nothing, but Jellal was clearly shaken to learn that they were going somewhere so significant to Zeref and his followers. So she would let his mysterious comment slide. For the time being, anyways. 

“Alright, then…” 

* * *

_ Smoke danced in the wind, billowing out of Natsu’s mouth with each frenzied breath he took, his chest heaving.  _

_ He could feel blood running down his chin, coating his teeth. He ran his tongue over his fangs, poking at the hunks of meat and strips of flesh stuck between them.  _

Where am I? 

_ His claws shredded through something soft. Something warm. Something alive. Throbbing, squirming muscle wrapped around his fingers, as he tore and tore through the writhing bodies pinned beneath him.  _

_ Flames rose higher, burned hotter, flared redder. The flesh beneath his hands turned to soup as he shredded it, before melting into paste and goo, sticking to his palms, gluing itself beneath his claws. He should have been disgusted, horrified, but Natsu found that he didn’t mind.  _

_ Hollow eyes stared up at him. Brown eyes, blue eyes, red eyes, green eyes. They burned along with the rest of the bodies.  _

_ Something in his chest fractured.  _

_ He didn’t know if it was good or bad.  _

_ The bones crumbled to ashes in his hands, but despite the bodies disappearing, disintegrating into nothingness, the screams echoed in his head, begging and pleading.  _

What are you doing!? What’s wrong with you!? 

Please! Please, stop! 

We love you, I still love you! You can stop this! 

Natsu! 

_ He shook his head, the fire burning and burning and burning, eating the world alive. Just as it should be. It should all  _ burn. _ It should burn and burn and burn, leaving nothing but screaming bodies to shred his claws through, to tear into with his fangs.  _

_ It was only right.  _

_ Burn it all… destroy it all… for Zeref.  _

_ For Zeref.  _

_ His flames melting Erza’s armor. His claws in Gray’s chest. His teeth in Wendy’s throat. His heel smashing Gajeel’s skull. His fist crushing Lisanna’s heart.  _

_ They were nothing when it came to Zeref.  _

_ Nothing…  _

* * *

“Natsu! Natsu! Please,  _ please! _ You have to wake up!” 

Natsu jerked up with a gasp, caring nothing for the blood red flames roaring around him, eating up the forest, destroying it all. 

“Natsu, stop burning everything!” Happy shouted, his claws sinking into his jacket. “Before it’s too late and it spreads!” 

Natsu stared down at the Exceed. 

_ His friends, his  _ family, _ burning in his fires. _

A panicked gasp escaped him. 

“Killed them…” he murmured, his eyes going wide. “Killed them all, kill… killed—” His jaw snapped shut, his fangs clicking.  _ “Ha!”  _

“N-Natsu…?” Happy whimpered, as he slowly backed away from the dragon slayer. 

“I killed them all!” He drug his hand down his face, strangled noises escaping him. Some awful, garbled mix of laughter and screaming. “Did I wanna kill them?” 

_ “Natsu!”  _ Happy screamed. “Natsu, please! Please wake up!” 

Natsu leaned down, baring his fangs at the cat. “I’m awake. I’m awake and I killed them!” Tears slid down his cheeks, blurring his already hazy vision. “I don’t know if… If I can…” 

_ I killed my friends.  _

He knew it was a dream. But it didn’t  _ matter. _ He’d thought it was real, and he remembered it perfectly. Remembered  _ every detail _ of  _ butchering  _ every person he cared about. And he’d  _ liked _ it. Every part of him had wanted to do it. 

_ I wonder if their skin really feels like that when it melts….  _

Natsu gasped and threw himself to the ground, curling up and clutching at his head, roaring and screeching. The flames climbed higher, burned hotter. 

It hurt. It  _ hurt. _ It hurt so fucking much! 

_ I wanted them dead, I wanted to kill them. Do I still want to? Tear their skin off…  _

Happy’s wailing melded with the roaring flames, both noises fading to static in Natsu’s head. 

_ Kill… Kill for Zeref…. Burn for Zeref… Destroy for Zeref…  _

Sharp, pinpricks of pain blossomed to life on his wrists. 

The flames vanished, the forest going abruptly silent, save for Happy’s crying. 

Hot, sticky blood dripped down his wrists, staining the ground red, and Natsu realized he’d accidentally sunk his claws into his own skin, and he was one twitch away from tearing his own veins out. 

_ I don’t want to kill anyone…  _ he realized, unable to tear his eyes away from the blood. 

_ I care about them. I  _ love _ them. I don’t want to hurt them. I’d rather  _ die _ than hurt them.  _

He sank his claws in deeper, relishing in the pain, needing it,  _ wanting _ it. 

The pain grounded him. The pain sated him. That need for blood… destruction… 

All he had to do was tear his own body open… And it stopped. 

_ What’s wrong with me?  _

Slowly, he pulled his claws out, terrified the horrible, confusing thoughts would come rushing back, but they didn’t. 

_ I’ll kill you! _

That was what he'd said, wasn’t it? What he’d screamed at Gray, the last day he had seen him? 

More tears fell. 

_ Remember, I just have to hurt myself… yeah…  _

Hurt himself, and then the urges went away. Hurt himself, and he didn’t want to hurt anyone else. Yeah, yeah… 

He held his claws up, watching his blood drip away from them. 

Natsu knew something was wrong with him. Had  _ been _ wrong with him, for a very long time. But ever since Tartaros… ever since he left… it’d gotten worse. 

He knew he couldn’t go back to everyone else. He might  _ never _ be able to go back to everyone else. So long as he had these dreams, these thoughts… so long as he was dangerous, could  _ hurt _ them, he could never go back. 

He  _ refused _ to go back. He’d stay in these mountains forever, clawing his skin open, if that was what it took to keep them safe. 

Keep them safe… 

“Happy… I’m okay now…” Natsu whispered, his voice hoarse. 

Happy was crouched low to the ground, his ears pressed flat against his skull. “Are… are you sure?” 

“Yeah, I’m sure,” he said. “I’m sorry I scared you. That was… that was a really bad one.” 

The Exceed nodded. “Yeah… it was…” 

Natsu took a shaky breath.  _ I’m sorry for a lot of things.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I swear there is like... an actual reason that Jellal knows about Natsu being E.N.D. when none of the other people who worshipped Zeref did, and Ultear and Meredy only knew he was because of Tenrou (though now Cobra knows too). But yeah, there's a reason lmao


	5. Ur's Cabin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Juvia and Gray arrive at Ur's cabin, Sting ropes someone else into being Sabertooth's guildmaster, and Loke finds Cana after another breakdown.

Gray wasn’t sure if he was relieved or upset that Ur’s home had been completely abandoned. On the one hand, he was glad no one else had moved in, made it their own, and removed everything that was familiar about it to him, but it also hurt to see it so run down, the kind of dilapidated that came when a house wasn’t taken care of for almost twenty years. 

The windows had all been broken, only a few shards of glass clinging to the frames. The door was barely hanging from its hinges, and the inside was filled with snow and ice. It wouldn’t surprise him if most of the infrastructure had started rotting away due to all the moisture inside. 

“Are you okay, Gray?” Juvia asked, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. 

“I’m fine,” he said with a sigh. “I knew it was probably going to be bad. After all, most normal people wouldn’t want a cabin this far out in the mountains with no heat source except a little fireplace.” 

“It  _ is _ a bit reclusive,” Juvia agreed.

Gray hummed as they walked up the steps, wincing as each piece of wood groaned beneath their weight. “Ur was a… bit antisocial. We only ever went to the nearest town when we really needed to. I think it was because the Council wanted to make her a wizard saint, but she didn’t want the title. She kind of employed the whole ‘out of sight, out of mind’ tactic.” 

“Explains why  _ you’re _ so antisocial,” she chuckled. “You must have picked it up from her.” 

Gray shook his head. “I really wouldn’t consider myself antisocial. Especially compared to her.” 

“Whatever you say,” she teased. “But…” Her voice grew more sincere. “I think this is the most I’ve ever heard about Ur. You never really talk about her much.” 

He shrugged. “What’s there to talk about?” 

“Well I mean… she was important to you,” she said. 

Gray frowned and kicked the door open, shoving against the snow that had piled against it inside. “Yeah, but there’s still not much to say.” Honestly, he hadn’t even told Natsu and Erza much about Ur. They knew some about her, obviously, but… Gray had just never been able to bring himself to really  _ talk _ about her. Not in the same way Natsu had always reminisced about Igneel. 

But then again… Natsu had never believed Igneel to be truly gone, like Gray knew Ur was. 

“I wonder if anything actually managed to survive here,” Gray mused before Juvia could ask about Ur again. “Maybe in some of the back rooms?” 

Juvia opened her mouth, like she might want to try asking again, but then she closed it and merely nodded. “Yeah, okay.” 

Gray left Juvia to explore some of the other rooms, while he wandered into Ur’s old bedroom. Back when he’d lived here, he’d never really gone into her room. It wasn’t that it had strictly been off limits, but Ur had always respected his and Lyon’s privacy (as best she could as what was basically an adoptive mother), so Gray had always wanted to return the favor. 

So it felt strange to be in the room now, even with it in shambles and everything else that had happened. 

All their belongings were still here, since even bandits didn’t come out here. Sure, a lot of it was destroyed thanks to the elements and probably some wild animals, but… it was all still here. The furniture, clothes were still hung in her closet, so anything she might have on demons was almost definitely still here, which was a very good thing for them. 

Gray took a deep breath, and stepped over to the dresser to start going through drawers. Most, it was more clothes, the fabric fraying and covered in little holes, but there was some jewelry, little knick knacks, but nothing that would have been helpful, or that he even felt nostalgic for. 

He moved to the nightstand next to the bed, opening the little drawer, and narrowing his eyes as he saw it was filled with handwritten notes and letters. As careful as possible, he pulled the stack of them out. Some were a little water damaged, but thankfully they were mostly intact, and legible. He flipped through them, seeing that about half were in Isvanian, but the rest were Fioran, thankfully. They were all the same handwriting, so he assumed they were Ur’s, and not anything she had received from anyone else. He shifted through the papers, finding one that he could easily read. 

_ Got into it with Jason today over Gray. He thinks I’m being stupid for teaching him magic, saying it’ll only make his demon side surface earlier. I mean, he is right when it comes to that, but it’s what the brat wants, and I think this will be beneficial to him. And besides, none of the superstitions about demons have helped the Fullbusters in the past. I think it’s time to try something new. And besides, when Gray’s demon side inevitably becomes more obvious, hopefully there will be some way for me to help him. I’m sure I can come up with something.  _

Gray sucked in a shaky breath, and set the letters off to the side, not wanting to accidentally crumple them up as his fists clenched. 

Had Ur really been planning to keep him close for so long? To try and come up with some way to help him when he inevitably snapped? 

He held his hand over his mouth, trying to bite back a sob. 

She’d been willing to do all that for him, and he’d gotten her  _ killed. _ Gods, he really hadn’t deserved her. 

But he’d come all this way for answers, so he picked the notes back up, and flicked through the ones in Fioran, deciding to worry about the ones in Isvanian when he finally sat down and decided to translate the diary they’d found in his old home too. 

_ I remember Sarah saying something about the Fullbusters always wearing silver crosses. Everyone born into the family supposedly received one once they turned a certain age, I wasn’t sure how true that was, but Gray is always very careful with his cross necklace. I doubt he even knows the superstitions about crosses and demons, and I can’t help but wonder if the Fullbusters started the tradition of wearing the jewelry due to something related to their demonic blood. Perhaps a misguided hope that it might slow the transformations? I highly doubt they would help, but it probably would have been a nice comfort to them.  _

Gray clutched at his necklace, his fingers tracing the grooves of the cross, before his hand drifted up to his father’s earrings. He remembered receiving his necklace when he was young, his father telling him it was a family tradition, and to take very good care of the necklace. He also remembered his mother telling him about how his father had also given her a ring with a silver cross on it, along with her engagement ring, when he proposed. Had it really started as some desperate attempt to keep their demonic blood at bay? 

Gods, that was fucked up. And clearly hadn’t worked. 

But… he could admit the sentiment was nice, if someone actually believed it would work. 

_ Ever since Sarah died, Jason has basically retired from demon hunting, wanting to focus as much of his time as possible on Juvia, not that I can blame him. I’ve been meaning to go visit him, introduce Juvia to Lyon and Gray, they are similar ages, and they could all do with some more friends, but evidently she took Sarah’s death a lot harder than Jason had been expecting, so I want to give her more time before I introduce them.  _

Gray couldn’t help but smile. So he and Juvia had been that close to meeting years before they actually had, huh? 

_ But due to that, he said he doesn’t want to waste all the knowledge on demons his family has gathered over the generations, especially since Juvia has expressed that she doesn’t want to get involved in the life, not that I can blame her at all. So he’s given me coordinates to his family’s old crypt, out at the border, where the original Fullbuster-Lockser massacre was. I’ve been meaning to go check it out, but if I did, I’d have to bring Gray and Lyon, and I’m not sure if I want to explain everything to them yet.  _

Gray hummed, and quickly skimmed through the rest of the letter, until he found coordinates to the location in question. “Hey, Juvia!” he shouted. “I think I know where we can go next!” 

* * *

“Minerva!” Sting sang as he waltzed into her bedroom. “I have some papers I need you to sign.” 

Minerva sat up with a glare, tightening her blanket around her shoulders. “Where’s Rogue?” 

“Out on a quest with Orga and Elfman,” he said. “I couldn’t go ‘cause of the stupid guildmaster duties that Rogue just  _ wouldn’t _ let me skip out on.” He rolled his eyes. “But I really do need you to sign these.” 

Minerva sighed and held her hand out. “Fine, what the hell are they for?” 

“Just some reinstatement papers,” he said, placing them in her hand, along with a pen. “Makes you an official member again and all the jazz.” 

She frowned, her eyes narrowing. “Since when is this a thing?” She’d already filled out all the needed paperwork to join Sabertooth again, as if she were a new member, which was standard for returning members. She didn’t know anything about an extra form specifically for members who were  _ rejoining. _

“Eh, it’s a new thing,” he said with a wave of his hand. “Just need you to sign it.” 

“Whatever.” She laid it down on the bed, and signed the papers. 

“Great!” Sting snatched them back. “You’re guildmaster now. I’m gonna go catch up with Rogue.” 

“Wait…” Minerva jumped out of bed, the blanket falling to the ground.  _ “What!?”  _

Sting froze in the doorway, and turned around to give her a sheepish smile. “I filled out all the forms, and you just signed the confirmation, so yeah, you’re Sabertooth’s guildmaster now. So uh… have fun.” 

“I am  _ not—” _ she began. 

“Come on, you’ve wanted the job forever now!” he whined. “And I  _ really _ wanna catch up with Rogue and go on an actual fun quest again.” 

_ “Sting!” _ she snarled, baring her teeth and flexing her claws. “You can’t just  _ do _ this! No one is ever going to go along with it! Not anyone in the guild, and  _ certainly _ not the fucking Council—” 

“The Council is in shambles,” he said with a shrug. “Besides, we’re a private organization, they have no say in who we can and can’t put in charge. I checked.” 

“They can if I’m a  _ criminal!”  _ she growled. Gods, did Sting really not understand how  _ terrible _ of an idea this was? 

“But you’re not! No one involved in Tartaros is getting charged, even though it was illegal conflict, because of… the circumstances. They don’t have to know that you were… you know…” His forced smile grew even wider. “A member of Tartaros for a bit.” 

“Oh, yes, I’m sure they’ll  _ never _ figure it out,” she drawled. “How could they? It’s not like I have goddamn horns or anything!” 

“Come on, Minerva,” Sting practically pleaded. “We both know I’m gonna be terrible at this job! I’m just not built for it. But you  _ are! _ You’re a great leader, and you have the mind for it! If the guild really doesn’t like it, me and Rogue can talk to everyone.” 

“Oh, so Rogue knows about this?” she demanded. Gods, she was going to skin him alive next time she saw him. She wasn’t even ready to go to the guildhall and pick out a  _ job. _ How could she be expected to  _ lead _ it? 

“Well, uh…” Sting rubbed his shoulder. “Rogue doesn’t know either, but I’ll talk to him and I’m sure he’ll see it’s a good idea.” 

_ “Unbelievable,”  _ Minerva snapped. “Gods, do you ever fucking think, Sting!?” 

“Yeah, I thought about this, and I still think it’s a really fucking good idea, Minerva!” he exclaimed. “You’re clearly the best person we have for the job!” 

“I’m—” 

“Look…” He sighed and shook his head. “If you really don’t wanna do it, I’ll burn up this form and it won’t mean shit. But… at least think about it? Please? For my sake, if nothing else, because I fucking  _ hate _ this job. And I do genuinely think you’d be good at it, it’s not just me trying to shove it off onto you, because god knows there would be people easier to convince than you, you stubborn bitch.” 

“Watch it.” 

Sting ignored her. “So think about it. I won’t tell anyone about this—” He held the form up. “And I’ll keep doing this shitty job until you make up your mind. But seriously, consider it, Minerva.” 

She huffed and crossed her minds, but she couldn’t deny that she would be a much better guildmaster than Sting. Not that that would exactly be hard, though. “Fine.” 

“Great!” Sting said with a grin. “Get back to me soon.” 

* * *

Loke shuffled down the stairs of their apartment, stifling a yawn. Gods, he should really start asking Lucy to wake him up before she went to work in the morning. This habit of sleeping past one in the afternoon was not great. “Cana? Please tell me you’ve made breakfast, or lunch, I guess?” She hadn’t been in bed this morning, so obviously she had to be up. 

Muffled sobbing had his eyes widening, waking him up much faster than any breakfast or coffee could. “Cana!” He bounded down the stairs, and skidded across the apartment, finding Cana crouched on the floor behind the kitchen’s island. 

“Cana?” He kneeled down next to her, worried it was another breakdown, but thankfully there was no blood or scratch marks on her arm over the runes. Or… fresh ones, at the least. But then he noticed the blood dripping down the side of her face, and the scissors lying on the floor a few feet away, and how fucked up her  _ hair _ was. “Oh, Cana, what happened?” 

She jerked her head up, and he realized the botched haircut was even worse than he’d first noticed, and that she clutched handfuls of her hair. “I-I-I don’t know why I—” She gasped for breath. “Why I cut it. It-It just… it itched so bad, and-and it was in the way, and I—” She sucked in a sharp breath through her teeth. “I r-ruined it, didn’t I?” 

“No…” Loke assured her, though it even sounded fake to him. Cana had hacked away most of the hair on the right side of her head, leaving only extremely short, uneven strands. 

“Oh gods.” She dropped the handfuls of hair, and scrubbed at the tears on her cheeks. “This is so fucking stupid. What the hell is wrong with me? I want some fucking vodka.” 

Loke shook his head. “I don’t think that’s a good idea right now…” 

“I  _ want _ a damn drink,” she growled, though it wasn’t very menacing with the tears still streaming down her face, and hair clinging to her shirt. 

“Cana…” He took a deep breath. “You need to calm down, get cleaned up, and then I can pop over to the Celestial Spirit world, and have Cancer come back with me. He can fix your hair right up, grow it back and everything.” 

But Cana shook her head. “No… No, I don’t want it back, I want it gone.” 

“Gone…?” He reached out, and wiped at the trail of blood dripping down her temple. Fortunately or unfortunately, the injury seemed to be from Cana’s scratching, not a mishap with the scissors. “You… you want to shave your head? I-I mean… if that’s what you want, but I think you should give that a little more thought.” 

“No, the part I tried to cut, where the runes are at. I want it  _ gone. _ It tingles, a-and it itches, and…” She pressed her palms against her eyes, the sobs returning in full force. “I have to cut half my hair off.” 

“Hey…” Loke settled down next to her, and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “We’ll figure this out, alright? And as soon as we get it figured out, Cancer can fix it for you.” 

“B-But I still have to…” She sniffled, and wiped at her nose with the back of her hand. “I don’t wanna cut my stupid hair, I wanna quit having these goddamn mental breakdowns, I just want everything to go back to  _ fucking normal! _ I want Mira’s drinks, and to yell at Gray and Natsu for fighting too loud, and to go pick out job requests the day before rent’s due, and I  _ fucking hate this!”  _

“I know…” Loke pulled her closer. “This fucking sucks, but… we still need to make the best of it.” 

She kicked her foot out, leaving the scissors to skid across the kitchen floor. “I don’t wanna.” 

“I’m sorry, babe. But I’ll go get Cancer,” he said. “And while he’s fixing your hair, I’ll make you something to eat. And when Lucy gets back from work, we can… we'll talk about some things, okay?” 

Cana pulled her knees to her chest and pressed her forehead against them, but muttered a muffled, “Okay,” and let Loke pull her to her feet and clean the blood off her. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought that there had to be some kind of significance of the cross jewelry since both Gray and his father had it, so yeah, here's my little explanation for it. Idk, I thought it was kinda sweet, and made sense within the context of this fic


	6. Missing You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natsu continues to spiral, Chelia has a question for Wendy, Levy starts her new job, and Lisanna comes up with an idea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk why Natsu thought some alone time would be a good thing, he's really not built for it

Natsu stared down at the bottle, watching the liquid inside it swirl around, before taking another swig from it, forcing back a shudder at the awful taste. He’d never really been one for alcohol. Especially hard liquor, but hey, given his current living situation, he didn’t have the luxury of being picky. 

He had no idea what had possessed him to start drinking this, but he’d already gone through a whole bottle, and was halfway through his second. Maybe if he blacked out he wouldn’t dream tonight… 

Natsu forced himself to his feet, and draped himself over the box he’d torn open, sifting through the rest of its contents. More bottles of liquor rattled against each other, and he hummed in disappointment as he realized that was all the box contained. He glanced around the small cavern, taking in all the other boxes, and hoped some of them had something more entertaining than alcohol. Or at the least, maybe some new clothes. He was tired of washing the same set he had over and over in rivers and streams. 

Especially considering all the accumulating bloodstains that he couldn’t get out no matter how hard he scrubbed. 

Honestly, he and Happy had really lucked out finding this cave. From the looks of it, some traders or maybe some bandits had stashed it here, but either forgotten about it, or hadn’t come back. Either way, it’d been out here for  _ years, _ but Natsu wasn’t going to complain. This random shit was the best thing he could get when it came to  _ supplies. _

He took another drink of whiskey, and stumbled his way over to the next box. He frowned and set the bottle down, hardly noticing as he kicked it over and the liquid sloshed out of it, running over the ground. He dug his claws into the box’s lid, wrenching it away, grunting as splinters dug into his skin beneath his claws. 

“Stupid…” He fell to the ground against the box, and chewed at his claws, picking out the splinters with his teeth. “Stupid wood.” He glared at it, and punched his fist into it, effectively lighting it ablaze, before remembering he hadn’t even seen what was inside it. “Ah, fuck.” He reached his hand out, reaching for the bottle he  _ knew _ he’d set down somewhere, before groaning as his hand landed in something wet and he realized he’d spilled it. Whining, he lifted the bottle to his mouth, only a few drops of alcohol dropping onto his tongue. “This  _ sucks!”  _ He fell backwards, the burning wood crunching around his body. 

“Natsu?” 

The dragon slayer jerked his head up, grinning as he watched Happy bound into the cave. “Hey, buddy. You find…” He trailed off, blinking tiredly. 

Happy climbed onto his chest, a concerned look in his eyes. 

“Dinner?” he finished. “You know…” He lifted his hand up and waved it. “Fishing. Fish…” His smile widened. “Hah, fish. They don’t have legs, they just flop around.” 

“You smell like alcohol,” Happy said. 

“Yeah! You want some?” Natsu jerked up, causing Happy to yowl and sink his claws into his jacket to keep from tumbling back to the ground. “There’s a whole box of it over here! I wann’another bottle.” 

“Natsu!” Happy exclaimed, still clinging onto him. “You shouldn’t be drinking this stuff! Who knows how long it’s been here! It’s probably not good anymore!” 

“Nah, it’s fine,” Natsu insisted, already sorting through the bottles, wanting to make sure there wasn’t anything different that might taste a little better. Unfortunately, it was all the same whiskey. “Cana says old alcohol’s better.” 

“That’s  _ not _ what that means, Natsu!” Happy protested. “How much have you had already?” 

He waved him off. “Just a bottle and a half… I think…” Then he nodded. “Yeah, bottle’n a half.” And it was already doing a wonderful job of making his thoughts fuzzier. 

Happy flattened his ears, and finally dropped back to the ground. “Natsu, I’m getting really worried about you. I think… I think we should go back soon. Don’t you think everyone else could… help you?” 

Natsu’s smile melted, just as his fingers curled around a new bottle. “I’m not going back.” 

“But—” 

He shook his head. “No, I’ll hurt ‘em.” He flicked the bottle open with his claw. “Not going back.” 

“You’re hurting  _ yourself,” _ Happy said, his tone laced with worry. “You won’t eat unless I ask you to, and… and you…” He dipped his head, and his tail began to swish side to side. “You’re clawing your arms open every other day now. And obviously you won’t listen to me… I-I just… I don’t like watching you like this, Natsu. You shouldn’t be alone. Especially not when you’re… like this.” 

Natsu huffed. “I  _ said _ I’m not going back!” Not until he had actually done what he had set out to do! “But you can if you wanna.” He wasn’t stupid. He knew Happy wasn’t having a good time, and Natsu knew his own stubbornness wasn’t helping. 

“I’m  _ not _ leaving you alone,” Happy said firmly. 

Natsu shrugged, and started on the next bottle of whiskey. Honestly, he couldn’t blame the Exceed. He knew if he were watching the train wreck his life had become the past few weeks from an outside perspective, he would be concerned he’d end up dead in a ditch if he was left unsupervised. But… he was sure he’d be fine. He just needed some more time. Yeah… 

Yeah, just some more time. 

Happy sighed, and climbed into Natsu’s lap as soon as the dragon slayer sat back down. “I found a river. We’ll go fishing tomorrow after you’re… feeling better.” 

Natsu scratched between Happy’s ears. “Sure thing, buddy.” 

* * *

“Are you sure you want to take that request?” Lyon asked. “It looks like it could involve some fighting—” 

“I fought in the Grand Magic Games and against Tartaros,” Wendy reminded him. “If it came down to it, I think I could handle a single dark guild wizard.” 

Lyon sighed and shook his head. “I know, I know, but I don’t like you going off and doing that kind of thing alone. You’re just a kid!” 

Wendy narrowed her eyes at him. “What were  _ you _ doing when you were my age?” 

“I—” Lyon snapped his mouth shut. “How old are you?” 

It took everything in Wendy not to smile as she turned back to the request board. “Thirteen.” Lyon had just walked straight into the same tactic she’d used on everyone back at Fairy Tail when they told her she was too young to do something. 

“Wandering the countryside trying to find some way to resurrect Deliora…” he grumbled. 

_ “Oh…”  _ Wendy nodded thoughtfully, and dragged her clawed fingers down the board, her eyes wandering over a few of the other requests. “But you think I can’t—” she glanced down at the flier in her other hand “—get back a stolen book on ancient spells? If it’s been recent enough, I could track the thieves by scent.” 

Lyon narrowed his eyes. “I  _ knew _ the Fairy Tail in you was going to show up eventually. You’re secretly a little gremlin, aren’t you? A mini fucking Natsu.” 

“Mom said I was more like Gajeel, Sting was the mini Natsu.” She turned back to him and held the flier up. “But I can go on this job, right?” Though she didn’t really know why she was asking  _ Lyon _ for permission. It wasn’t up to him. 

But maybe it was just habit, asking someone older than her for permission to do something. She was used to asking Natsu, or Erza, or Gray, or anyone who was nearby, really. Lyon was just the first person like that that she’d really latched onto here. Maybe it was because he reminded her of Gray… 

Lyon sighed and shook his head. “Oh, whatever. If you think you can do it, I’ll trust you. But maybe don’t go completely by yourself?” 

“I’ll have Charle,” she reminded him, nodding towards the table where the Exceed was engaged in a conversation with Sherry. 

“Right… Alright then.” He patted her head. “Just be careful.” 

Wendy leaned into the touch, her wings curling around her body as she did so. “Thanks, Mister Lyon.” 

“Ah, don’t call me ‘mister,’” he requested, pulling his hand back. “Makes me feel old as hell.” 

“You  _ are _ old,” she told him. “You’re like  _ thirty.”  _

“I’m only twenty-nine!” he protested. 

“Well…” Wendy held one finger to her chin. “I guess that’s not  _ that _ old then, if you’re not actually thirty.” 

She swore Lyon’s eye might have twitched, but he just scoffed and walked off, muttering something about  _ weird kids. _

Wendy couldn’t help but giggle. Lyon really was fun to antagonize. She wasn’t sure  _ why _ she liked to tease and bother him so much. Maybe it was because not a lot of people in Lamia Scale really did that? She  _ never _ thought she would miss Natsu and Gray going at it, or Juvia and Gajeel insulting each other, or Cana going after literally anyone who sat next to her, but Wendy  _ did. _

“Hey, Wendy!” Chelia bounded over, and peered over her shoulder to look at the job request.  _ “Ooooo, _ that one pays well!” 

Wendy nodded. “Yeah, I’m trying to save up so I can get a train ticket to go visit Sting and Rogue in Crocus.” She’d  _ like _ to see Natsu and Gajeel, too, but she had no idea where either of them were, ever since Gajeel had taken off for his new bounty hunting job. 

“Oh, that’ll be nice.” Chelia leaned against her, absentmindedly stroking the fur on Wendy’s shoulders. “But when you get back… I was wondering… if maybe you wanted to go on a date with me?” 

Wendy gasped, the flier fluttering from her fingers and drifting to the guildhall floor. “W-What?” 

“I mean, we don’t have to if you don’t want to!” Chelia backpedaled, jerking away from her, and wildly shaking her head and hands. “I-I just thought—Well I—” 

“I’d love to…” Wendy said softly, staring at Chelia with wide eyes. “You really wanna… do that with me?” 

“Oh!” Chelia froze. “Oh, of course I do!” 

Wendy nodded, unable to stop the smile from spreading across her face, or the blush from overtaking her cheeks. “Yeah, then as soon as I get back. I’d really like that.” 

Chelia squealed, and yanked Wendy into a snug hug. “You’re so cute!” 

Wendy purred and rubbed her face against Chelia’s chest. 

* * *

“Hey, Levy! Nice to see ya here!” Bisca waved at her, and marched down the halls. “Damn, of course you’d find some way to make this shitty Council uniform look cute.” 

“Hey, Bisca!” Levy chuckled and shook her head. “And yeah… these things really suck. Did they have to be  _ white?”  _

Bisca sighed and rolled her eyes. “Apparently, yes. The only person who actually likes them is Laki.” 

“Of course she does.” 

“But what have you been up to?” Bisca asked, falling into step beside Levy as she headed towards her new office. “I mean, I know it’s only been a few weeks, but you know…” 

“Oh, just visited my family,” she said. “What about you? Was everything fine with the move? How are Alzack and Asca?” 

“Asca loves her new school,” Bisca said with a fond smile. “She’s already made quite a few new friends. And Alzack…” She laughed and shook her head. “I make more than enough with this job, so he’s decided to just stay home and focus on Asca. I’m glad for it, honestly. I never realized how lucky I was with the guild, working just whenever we needed to, and always able to take her with us if it wasn’t dangerous. And then even if it was, tons of free babysitters were everywhere.” 

“Huh…” Levy tilted her head. “Guess I never even thought about that. It’s probably been hard, hasn’t it? Not being able to see her as much?” 

Bisca shrugged. “Yeah, but I’m sure things will slow down here once there’s a bit more actual structure. Speaking of which, I’m probably late for a meeting.” She clapped Levy on the shoulder. “But it’s great seeing you again. You should come by sometime for dinner, yeah?” 

Levy smiled. “Sure thing, Bisca!” 

“Hell yeah!” She turned on her heel, and headed in the opposite direction. “See you around, Levy!” 

Well, at least Bisca seemed to be settling in nicely. Levy was sure she’d start hearing from some other friends after they heard she was here and they knew where they could send any letters or visit, but she hoped they were all doing okay, too. Though of course, she wasn’t expecting to hear anything from Natsu or Erza anytime soon, unfortunately. Or Gray and Juvia. She hoped they were alright… 

She sighed, and finally reached her new office. Given how high up she was in this makeshift chain of command, she’d gotten her own office. She wasn’t so sure how she felt about that, and was a little worried Hisui was putting a  _ little _ too much faith in her. The Princess and Yukino were at the highest level, with Levy just below them. Apparently, they were going to hire some more people for the same job Levy had, but no real decisions had been made yet. But gods, Levy really hoped they did, she didn’t want to shoulder all this responsibility alone. 

She’d assumed her job would be to feed other people clearer ideas of how to rebuild to the Council, not  _ actually _ being put in charge of people. Gods forbid she ever had to lead the rune knights on some kind of mission. 

The office space was small, filled with bookshelves, and a desk in the middle. Several lacrima screens were in one corner, and she made a mental note to figure out exactly what those things did. 

“Well… guess this is it.” She shuffled over to the desk, and began to flick through all the papers piled on it. “Should probably start going through this.” According to Hisui, the first few weeks were just going to be filing away information on all the new wizards that had been hired. 

“Oh!” The door to her office was thrown open. “I told you she’d be here today ‘Nana!” Laki stuck her head inside. “What’s up, Levy?” 

“Hey! It’s good to see you, Laki!” Levy set down the file she was holding. It could wait a few more minutes. “Is Kinana with you?” 

Laki nodded. “Yep! Come on, babe. Levy wants to see you!” She tugged the other woman into the office. 

“Hi, Levy.” Kinana offered her a little wave. “Who’d have thought we’d all end up here, working for the Council.” She held her hand over her mouth and snickered. “Well, I mean, I’m just an assistant ‘cause I don’t really have magic or anything, but… you know. I don’t think Hisui knew that when she asked me to come work for her.” 

“Nah, but she said you could be promoted if you learned something.” Laki wrapped her arm around her girlfriend’s waist. “So I’m trying to teach her some.” 

“Oh, I can try and teach you some, too!” Levy offered. “The basics of script magic aren’t too hard to learn, if you’re interested.” 

“Thanks, Levy! I appreciate it!” Kinana said. “It never really bothered me at the guild, not having magic. But now… it’s becoming an issue. Because… all my work experience is with guilds, but I don’t really have  _ magic, _ so work is… yeah, I don’t blame anyone for not wanting to hire me.” She ducked her head, faint blush spreading across her cheeks. 

“Don’t say that!” Laki scolded. 

Levy chuckled. She could admit that both women were really good for each other. Laki was perfect for giving Kinana the pushes she needed, and Kinana kept Laki’s more… intense aspects in check. “So, how have you been liking Crocus?” 

“Oh, it’s not too bad,” Laki said with a shrug. “Biggest issue is now we have to put off the wedding.” She rolled her eyes. 

“Wait, the—the  _ wedding!?” _ Levy demanded. 

Kinana nodded. “Mmhm. We were getting ready to announce our engagement to the guild just before Tartaros, but… you know. We want everyone to be there, but that’s a little difficult now, so we decided to put it off for a while, so everyone could get settled in before we ask them to all come out here for a wedding.” 

“Oh, that’s amazing!” Levy exclaimed, clapping her hands together. “I mean… the engagement, I mean. Not the… having to put off the wedding part.” 

“Eh.” Laki waved her off. “It’s not  _ that _ big of a deal. We’ve been together this long without being married, we can wait a little bit longer. We just want to celebrate with everyone more than anything. So we’ll wait.” 

“Well I’m happy for you,” Levy said with a smile. 

“Yeah, well we’ll let you get back to work.” Kinana tugged Laki back out the door. “Come on, Laki. Looks like she’s got a lot to do. See you around, Levy!” 

Levy waved. “See you!” 

Maybe this job wouldn’t be as stressful as she thought, with some of her friends here. 

* * *

“Why the hell are you planning on going to Crocus?” Mirajane asked, leaning against Lisanna’s back to peer over her shoulder. “Oh, if you’re going to visit people, I want to come, too!” Levy had just finished moving there, right? Not to mention Cana. Mirajane  _ never _ thought she’d miss chasing the brunette away from the bar every night, but then again, after talking to someone so much everyday… it really was dumb not to consider how much she would miss Cana. 

“Oh… no, that wasn’t the plan,” Lisanna said. “Well, I guess if I’m going I’ll stop by and see some people, but that… wasn’t really my main priority.”

Mirajane frowned, and snatched the train ticket out of Lisanna’s hands. 

“Hey!” 

“Then why are you going?” she asked. “It’s not for a job. Is anyone else going? Milliana? You’ve been spending a lot of time with her recently. Or is it a training thing with Kagura?” 

Lisanna shook her head. “No, I just…” She reached out and tried to grab the ticket back. “It’s nothing.” 

Mirajane narrowed her eyes, but let Lisanna take the ticket back. She  _ knew _ something was up with her sister, and had been for a while. She’d noticed it when she started training so much with Kagura. Lisanna had never cared about that kind of thing before, and it was starting to worry her. She’d tried asking her about it a few times, but Lisanna kept brushing her off or avoiding the subject. “Is it Natsu? I really doubt he’d show up in Crocus, of all places.” 

Lisanna tensed up, and Mirajane sighed. She was going to  _ kill _ that idiotic dragon slayer when he got back. How  _ dare _ he just up and disappear on Lisanna like that, without even a word about where he was or what he would be doing. 

“I hope he’s okay…” Lisanna murmured. “I know he has Happy, and… that makes me feel a little bit better. But he loved his dad so much, and to watch that, I just…” She leaned over the counter, and clenched the train ticket so tightly it crinkled in her fist. “I’m worried about him.” 

Mirajane bit her tongue, reminding herself that Lisanna wouldn’t want to listen to her complain about him, and… she was right. Natsu  _ had _ watched his father get slaughtered right in front of him. “I know you are. And I’m sorry. I hope someone hears from him soon. We’re all getting worried. Last time Erza sent me a letter, she said none of Crime Sorciere had heard anything about him either.” 

Lisanna set the crumpled ticket down on the kitchen counter. “Yeah… speaking of Erza, what about her? Has she said anything about when she’ll be able to visit you?” 

Mirajane shrugged. “No… She mentioned it, after she gets done following up on this lead about Faeries, but… I don’t know for sure if she will or not. I do miss her, but at least I know what she’s doing. So, what’s the ticket for?” 

“I was thinking… well, I’ve always relied on my speed during battles,” she said. “But you and Elfman have a lot more power, so shouldn’t I be able to get that strong?” 

“Well…” Mirajane tapped her fingers against the counter. “It’s easier for Elfman and I to get stronger takeover forms than you, because of our magic. Demons and monsters are… well, they just have a little more brute power to them compared to animal souls. But that’s not anything you should worry about. Your speed and agility is a really good asset!” 

“I know that!” she said. “But Natsu told me about the dragon graveyard beneath the arena, and… there’s probably still some linger traces of dragon souls there, right?” 

“Lisanna… are you sure that’s a good idea?” It wasn’t that Mirajane doubted her little sister’s ability, but taking in a soul for a takeover that she wasn’t ready for could have some disastrous consequences, and she should  _ know _ that, considering all the horrible things that had happened due to Elfman and Mirajane doing that very thing. 

“I have to get stronger,” she said. “And if I could master a dragon takeover… I  _ know _ that would help. I know it.” 

Mirajane knew there would be no dissuading her sister. All she could do was hope she didn’t bite off more than she could chew. “Okay, but please,  _ please _ just be careful. If it gets to be too much, you have to pull back.” 

“I know, and I will, but I know I can do this,” she insisted. “I can handle this dragon takeover.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fulfilling my dragon takeover Lisanna dreams


	7. The Lockser Crypt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meredy contacts Jellal about a problem, Lucy decides on a way to honor Aquarius, and Gray and Juvia find her family's crypt.

_ Jellal!  _

Jellal jumped, not at all expecting to hear Meredy’s voice ringing through his head. “Gods above, I’ve told you not to do that without some kind of warning!” 

Erza glanced over her shoulder, momentarily forgetting about the fire she was trying to start. “Jellal? Everything okay?” 

He nodded, and gestured to his head. “Just Meredy.” 

“Oh, make sure you tell her we’re all doing alright!” she said with a smile, before turning back to her smoldering pile of sticks. 

“Speak for yourself,” Midnight grumbled. “The castle dungeons were better living arrangements than camping out in the woods with  _ you _ two.” 

Jellal rolled his eyes, and tuned out the bickering that started between Midnight and Erza.  _ What are you needing, Meredy?  _ They weren’t due for their weekly check in, so something had to have come up. Gods, he hoped it wasn’t a problem with the remaining Oracion Seis members. Meredy probably wouldn’t be able to handle all three of them on her own. 

“I can hear that, Jellal,” Cobra said. 

“Stay out of my head,” he muttered in reply. 

“Well make it be quieter.” 

Jellal growled and crossed his arms. Originally, he’d thought he and Erza had got the better part of the deal with Midnight and Cobra, but honestly, the couple’s passive aggressiveness and snappy comments were driving Jellal up the wall. 

_ We have a rising situation with some dark guilds, _ Meredy said, snapping Jellal out of his thoughts.  _ Angel and Hoteye stumbled across it yesterday, and we’re going to do some more investigating soon, but it’s looking pretty bad.  _

Jellal frowned.  _ What do you mean?  _ Dark guilds had been on the decline in recent years. It’d started with the capture of the Oracion Seis, with a steady drop after the defeat of Grimoire Heart. Surely the destruction of Tartaros would only hasten that process. After all, without the three most powerful dark guilds to make alliances with, the smaller ones were likely terrified they’d get busted by the Council or Crime Sorciere. 

Although… the Council wasn’t really much of a thing anymore, now was it? 

_ It seems like quite a few of the smaller dark guilds are banding together to create a much larger organization. They’re starting to follow this guild called Avatar, and already their numbers are in the three hundreds, and I’m sure only more are going to be drawn to this alliance.  _

_ Fuck… _ If the eight of them had been together, they probably would have been able to go ahead and take out this  _ Avatar, _ but Jellal didn’t want to leave Meredy, Angel, Hoteye, and Racer to take care of that themselves, and by the time his team got back in touch with them, this  _ Avatar _ might be too big for them to take down with simple brute force.  _ Yeah, that’s definitely an issue. Get any more information you can, but  _ be careful. _ When we get back, we’ll try and come up with a plan. We’re about a day’s ride from Erza’s coordinates, so with any luck, we should be able to meet up with you again soon.  _

_ Okay, we’ll see what we can find out, but please hurry. We don’t want this to become a bigger problem than it has to.  _

_ I know. We’ll be as quick as we can.  _

* * *

Quite honestly, Juvia had no idea what she was expecting from her family’s crypt. She didn’t even know what it would  _ look _ like, but given the sparse amount of information they’d managed to glean from Gray’s old village and Ur’s home, they didn’t have much of an option  _ but _ to go. 

Luckily, the coordinates from Ur’s letters weren’t too far. It actually shocked Juvia how close they were to everything that had happened with Gray, which only solidified just how much their families had been linked. Had the crypt been put here  _ because _ of the closeness? So her family would always have a safe haven and a well of information on hand for when they went out to murder Gray’s ancestors? 

The thought made her shudder. 

It took them a week to get from Ur’s home to the coordinates, and another two days to actually  _ find _ the crypt. And they only  _ did _ manage to find it thanks to the old, crumbling tombstones just barely peeking out from the ice and snow. And after that, it took another few hours to figure out which grave marker actually hid the entrance. 

_ Blue Fullbuster and Nora Lockser.  _ A joint grave, the only one in the little graveyard. 

Juvia brushed aside the snow, squinting to decipher the dates on the grave. They’d died the same day, over three hundred years ago. 

“Guess my family’s always been fond of naming their kids after colors,” Gray mused. “I thought it was a more recent thing.” 

Juvia chuckled. “Seems like your family has a lot of little traditions. It’s sweet. My family’s only tradition was killing  _ your _ family.” Her small smile melted. “Hey, isn’t this the only grave here that has  _ your _ name on it, too? The rest were just Lockser graves.” 

Gray shrugged. “I mean, is it really that weird? I don’t think your family liked mine, why would they bury us in their secret little graveyard out in the mountains?” 

“No, no, that’s what I mean,” she said. “It’s strange that there’s a Fullbuster buried here  _ at all. _ Let alone buried  _ with _ one of my ancestors.” She ran her fingers along the fading engravings once more, ignoring the cold that burrowed into her fingers. “And these are easily the oldest graves here. Do you think… they could have been the first ones?” 

Gray kneeled next to her for a better look at the graves. “What do you mean?” 

“Well, I mean, there had to be a  _ first. _ Your ancestor, who  _ actually _ had an Etherious for a parent, and then my ancestor who bonded themselves to them, and caused the massacre when they died,” she said. “The timing of their deaths matches the information that Ultear stole from the Council.” 

“I mean, I guess so,” he said. “But what’s it really matter?” 

“This has to be the way into the crypt,” Juvia realized. “Now we just have to figure out how to get it open.” 

* * *

At no point in her life, did Lucy ever think she was going to get a tattoo. It wasn’t that she had anything against them, she just never saw there being anything she knew for sure she would want on her body forever. Of course, there was her guildmark, which was basically a tattoo, but… that was different. That showed her loyalty to her guild, and to everyone who shared the mark. 

But this tattoo that she was getting… it was strictly for her. 

And Aquarius. 

Cana had been the one to suggest the idea, however indirectly. She’d mentioned something about the her, Lucy, and Loke getting matching tattoos, which Lucy hadn’t really been  _ against, _ even if she had no idea what they would get. 

And then she had remembered the way Aquarius’s symbol had emblazoned across her chest just after her key had been broken, and how safe it had made Lucy feel. 

Of course, Lucy knew any tattoo she got would never actually hold Aquarius’s power, and would never remind her of the mermaid’s presence the same way that marking had, but… She wanted that memory, something she could see, could hold onto, to remind her of her surrogate mother. 

Beyond getting Aquarius’s symbol across her collar bones, she’d also decided to get the silhouette of a mermaid just below it, on her sternum, trailing the length of her chest. 

Part of her knew Aquarius would  _ despise _ what she was doing, would hate her symbol being permanently etched onto Lucy’s skin, but honestly, that just made her want to do it more. What she wouldn’t give to see the spirit’s irritated scowl one more time, and over something as petty as a tattoo, no less. 

“You ready, babe?” Cana asked, gently squeezing her hand. 

“Yeah, I know it’s gonna hurt, but it can’t be that bad, right?” she asked. “I mean, we’ve been through worse. I can handle some needles, right?” 

Loke leaned over Cana’s shoulder, a wicked grin on his face. “I heard Laxus cried when he got his tattoos done.” 

“Son of a bitch,” Lucy whined, letting her head thump back on the table she laid on. 

Across the room, the tattoo artist chuckled, but she didn’t say anything to help negate Lucy’s newfound anxiety. 

“Eh, Laxus is a little bitch,” Cana said with a wave of her hand. “Maybe we should ask Jellal what his face tattoo felt like when we see him again!” 

“I don’t think that’s a tattoo, considering it matches Erza’s face marking,” Loke pointed out. 

Cana shook her head. “Oh, whatever.” She reached up to run her hand through her hair, only stopping as her fingers connected with her scalp, rather than tangling into the brunette locks that only covered half her head now. She let her hand fall back to her side with an irritated sigh. “But it’s going to look really good, so you won’t care about how much it hurts.” 

Lucy laughed. “Right.” 

* * *

Gray had been in quite a few crypts in his lifetime, what, given his career choices and all, but he had never been quite as uneasy about one as he was about the Lockser crypt. Maybe it was due to his own connection to the place, knowing that one of his ancestors rested in this hollowed out earth beneath long forgotten graves. 

It had taken a bit, but eventually Juvia had managed to figure out how to open the crypt up. It had taken her magic. Quite honestly, they’d figure it out by accident. She’d been attempting to wash the graves off, but as soon as her magic came into contact with them, the ground beneath the graves had cracked open, powered by some ancient mechanical engineering. 

Gray had no idea how Ur had been expecting to get to this place if Lockser magic was required for it to open, but he supposed it wasn’t a big deal. She probably had her ways. 

“At least it’s warmer down here,” Juvia said as they descended the slick stairs. She readjusted her coat. “Dark, though.” 

Gray hummed in agreement, and slid his hand across the cobweb-coated wall. The stone was surprisingly smooth to the touch. 

The stairs didn’t go down that far, leaving the main part of the crypt closer to the surface than Gray would have thought. The passage opened up into a small cavern, which was about half natural, half manmade. The cave was lined with shelves and shelves of books, accompanied by racks of old weaponry. There were also some old lacrimas, that had long since been depleted of magic. 

“This… is going to take forever to go through,” Gray said. He couldn’t forget that he still had his family’s journal and some of Ur’s letters to translate. 

Juvia stepped away from him to closer inspect the shelves. “I’m sure a lot of this won’t even be relevant to us. I mean, my family specialized in  _ killing _ demons, which is probably what most of this is on, and… Tartaros is dead now. There’s hardly any demons left.” 

“Just E.N.D.,” Gray muttered darkly. 

“Right,” Juvia said with a nod. “So I mean, really all we’re looking for would be any information on E.N.D., more details on what happened with our families in the past, and… maybe someway to fix the… issues with our bond.” 

Personally, Gray thought that was a lost cause, but he wasn’t going to tell Juvia that. If she wanted to look, he wasn’t going to stop her. But he had accepted his fate. He’d be human until she died, and after that, Erza or Natsu would put him in the ground. 

Well… if they were around they would. He’d made that plan when he thought they were going to see each other every day for the rest of their lives. But it had already been months since Fairy Tail had disbanded, and he hadn’t heard a single word from either one of them. 

He supposed he couldn’t blame Erza. She had tried, after all, to part on good terms with him, and had even promised to visit if he’d told her where he would be. But he hadn’t, so of course he couldn’t expect her to come see him. As much as it hurt, that was his own damn fault, and he would never hold that against her. He never should have taken his grief and confusion over the guild disbanding out on her. 

Natsu, however… 

Gray still felt anger bubble up when he thought about the dragon slayer. He  _ supposed _ that by now someone had probably at least  _ heard _ from him, if he hadn’t just come back altogether, but that didn’t change that he had left Gray, abandoned him, after the bastard had promised they would help one another. 

Of course, there were the much darker thoughts. Stubborn ideas that just refused to leave him alone. Natsu dead somewhere because he’d actually been horribly injured during Tartaros but hadn’t gotten healed. Natsu dead because he’d gone after Acnologia without thinking it through. Natsu dead because he couldn’t let the book of E.N.D. go and had gone searching for Zeref. 

There were a lot of  _ Natsu's dead _ scenarios that Gray just couldn’t seem to shake, and the horrible anxiety and grief he felt every time one of them crept into his head were the only feelings that seemed to be able to chase his anger with his best friend away. 

He despised it. 

“Gray, come look at this!” Juvia exclaimed, prying him out of his darkening thoughts. “I was right! Blue and Nora were the first ones! And look!” She held up an ancient, yellowing drawing. “They were engaged! It says so on the back, that this was drawn after Blue proposed!” 

“What?” Gray approached the desk Juvia was hunched over, and gently took the paper from her. 

The drawing depicted two women, probably in their late twenties or so, grinning and showing off two rings. Gray had no idea which one was supposed to be Nora and which one was supposed to be Blue, neither one of them looked anything like Juvia or himself, but to be fair, three hundred years had passed, and a lot of new genes had been introduced on both sides. “Huh… That… actually makes it so much worse.” Their families had slaughtered each other because of a bonding spell gone wrong, when before then, they had been perfectly united. 

“Yeah…” Juvia took the drawing back, something that could almost be described as wistful in her eyes. “They look so happy here. But… but when Nora died, that must have been when Blue…” 

“Yeah,” Gray muttered. “Although… if Blue married a woman, why the hell am  _ I _ here? I mean, you could be the descendent of one of Nora’s siblings or cousins or something, but if Blue was the one with the demonic blood, I  _ had _ to have come from her line.” 

Juvia shrugged. “Who knows? Maybe she had a kid before she married Nora.” 

“Yeah, I guess. Gods, if only she’d realized she was lesbian before this mess started,” he snorted. 

Juvia rolled her eyes. “Don’t talk like that. Sure, your family has had it rough, but none of you were  _ mistakes, _ and you  _ definitely _ weren’t.” 

Gray knew better than to argue with her, so he didn’t bother. 

“And besides, maybe she was bi,” she added. 

“Why are we arguing about our ancestors' sexualities?” he asked. 

“You’re the one who brought it up,” she said, before tucking the drawing back into the drawer she must have found it in. “But… I guess this is where we’re going to be staying for the next few days while we go through all of this.” 

“Yeah.” Gray glanced around the crypt again, and took notice of the fireplace in the corner. “I’ll go out and get some wood, so you’re not so cold. And we can just sleep here. It’s the most comfortable we’re going to get out here.” 

“Thanks, Gray,” she said, already pilfering through the next drawer. “And you can probably finally work on those translations while we’re here.” 

“Yeah, hopefully.” Honestly, he was a little worried about what he might find in them, but he knew he couldn’t put off reading them forever. 

Besides, if he avoided any information about their pasts and families, he was defeating the entire purpose of this expedition they’d embarked on. 

They’d finally gotten to the point where they could learn the full truth, beyond the analytical, and likely biased facts, that Ultear had gotten from the Council. And they needed to know. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gray and Juvia’s lesbian ancestors getting married is honestly the closest I’ll ever get to having gruvia in anything I write lmfao


	8. The Ruins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lisanna arrives at the dragon graveyard, Minerva is named the Sabertooth guildmaster, Levy goes out for drinks with Bisca, Laki, and Kinana, and Jellal and Erza finally find Mavis's diaries

“This place is so creepy!” Milliana cried, clinging onto Kagura’s arm. Lisanna made a mental note to ask her how far her cat attributes extended, because she  _ swore _ the cat girl’s hair was standing on end, puffing up like a frightened feline’s. 

“I told you you didn’t have to come,” Lisanna said. Actually, she had  _ planned _ to do this completely alone, she’d even managed to talk Mirajane out of coming with her, despite her sister wanting to come visit everyone now living in Crocus. But when Kagura had her plans for a dragon takeover, she’d insisted on coming, saying she would like to better learn how her magic worked, especially if they were going to continue training together. And, of course, Milliana accompanied Kagura pretty much everywhere. “I warned you it would be bad.” 

Millliana hissed, her ears pinned back and tail lashing. “There’s a _horrible_ energy here.” 

“Trust me.” Lisanna glanced around the cavern, at the countless skeletons covering it. “I know.” She couldn’t even imagine what Natsu, Gajeel, and Wendy had felt when they’d been down here, seeing the remains of all these great beasts. It really did just prove that dragons were long gone. And now… after the passing of the slayers’ parents, they knew for sure that they were. 

“This must be hard for you,” Kagura said. “Your former guild had a special connection with dragons.” 

“I mean… Not really.” Lisanna laid her hand on a skull, delicately brushing away the dust and dirt that covered it. “It was just the slayers.” 

“You were all killed by a dragon,” she pointed out. 

“Ah, I guess.” Lisanna pulled her hand away from the bones. “Technically. Huh… we were declared dead, officially, weren’t we? Shit… I’ve been officially declared dead  _ twice _ now.” She shook her head, deciding not to dwell on the fact that when she actually died, she’d get a  _ third _ grave. “But anyways, I don’t think us nearly getting killed by Acnologia counts as us having a  _ special connection _ with dragons.” 

Kagura shrugged, and gazed out across the cavern. “So how exactly does this work? I always thought that for takeover magic to work, the user had to kill what they wanted to turn into.” 

Lisanna shook her head. “No, that’s a common misconception.” And something she was  _ very _ glad wasn’t true. She’d sob her eyes out if she had to kill an animal every time she wanted a new form. “I mean, we  _ could _ go out and kill something if we wanted to, but all we need is the soul, so if we find a dead thing… well,  _ we _ don’t have to be the one who killed it. It works best with things that have recently died, but considering Wendy was able to summon a ghost in this graveyard, I’m hoping there are enough lingering traces here for me to get enough dragon soul for at least a  _ partial _ takeover.” 

“That is  _ so _ complicated,” Milliana complained. 

“Not really. It’s actually fairly simple when you think about it,” she said. “Sometimes, we even take in new souls accidentally. It’s happened more to Mira than me or Elf, but it’s a possibility. It’s natural instinct for our bodies.” In fact, she  _ knew _ she was compatible with dragon souls, due to her body trying to absorb Grandine’s soul after the Tartaros battle, even if that particular dragon was  _ easily _ too much for her to handle. “But the souls here are so faint I’m going to have to concentrate really hard to absorb one. It might take a while.” 

“Well…” Kagura leaned against a massive femur and crossed her arms. “We have nothing else to be doing.” 

“Speak for yourself…” Milliana grumbled, reusing to even  _ touch _ any of the bones. “I’d much rather be touring Crocus than be down here in this creepy graveyard.” 

Lisanna rolled her eyes, but couldn't stop a quiet laugh from escaping her. Especially as Kagura began to scold Milliana and told her it was an  _ honor _ to experience something like this. 

Tuning out their bickering, Lisanna settled down on the ground, crossing her legs and holding her hands out, throwing her magic out across the cavern. She shut her eyes, feeling,  _ sensing _ for any lingering souls. 

She gasped, feeling soft, faint presences lingering beneath the blanket of her magic. 

She smiled, glad her theory had panned out. 

Dragon souls  _ did _ still linger in this place. 

* * *

“So as of today, Minerva is the new guildmaster!” Sting announced, gesturing to the woman in question. “So you’ll be bothering  _ her _ with all that bullshit now.” 

Rogue sighed as he slunk through the back of the guildhall, especially when the declaration was met with stunned silence, not one single bit of actual  _ support _ being voiced. Up at the front of the guildhall, Minerva shifted uncomfortably next to Sting. Though at the least, she was merely looking  _ awkward, _ rather than aggressive. 

“Come on!” Sting coaxed after a few moments of that atrocious silence. “We all know she’s going to do a better job than me! At least she knows what taxes are! I was raised in the fucking  _ woods!”  _

“Sting…” Rogue sighed and shook his head. It wasn’t that the guild thought Sting would be an amazing guildmaster, it was that they trusted him not to put through what Jiemma had, and quite obviously… Minerva did not have that trust. 

He had half a mind to step in, try and control this situation before it got any worse, such as people openly voicing their dislike of this decision, but Rogue didn’t really want to be involved anymore than he had to be. Sure, whether it was Sting or Minerva in charge, he would help them. Of course he would. But  _ behind _ the scenes. He didn’t like being the center of attention, and that  _ included _ getting up in front of everyone and informing them of a decision they  _ weren’t _ going to like. 

“I trust her! I think she’ll do a great job!” 

Surprise flitted through Rogue, as the last person he would have expected voiced his support for Minerva. 

Elfman shoved his way through the crowd, everyone’s attention on him. “Come on, she was the one who led your team during the Games, right? She’s got a knack for this kinda thing!” 

“Exactly!” Sting exclaimed. “Thank you, Elfman!” 

Minerva stared at Elfman with the same shock and disbelief as Rogue. Out of everyone here, she probably assumed the former Fairy Tail mage would hate her the most. Torturing Wendy during the Games, torturing Milliana to get at Erza, attacking Erza  _ again _ in Sun Village, and then joining Tartaros and agreeing to being transformed into a demon all so she could take down their guild. Actually… now that Rogue was thinking about it… why the hell  _ was _ Elfman voicing his support of her? Sure, he might not be one of the people who was more  _ directly _ affected by her actions, but it still made little sense to him. 

“Besides, you all trust Sting, don’t you?” Elfman grabbed Sting, and gods, his brother looked  _ tiny _ compared to Elfman’s massive frame. “He’s a great man, and he thinks this is a good idea!” 

Sting’s grin was blinding. “Thanks, Elfman! Minerva! Tell him thank you!” 

“Uh…” Minerva blinked, clearly struggling to even process what was even happening. “Thank… you, Elfman?” 

“You’re welcome!” He leaned over and slapped her shoulder so hard she went stumbling forward, and a few other members of the guild began to snicker. 

Rogue took a deep breath, letting his body relax. Maybe this really would work out like Sting was hoping. 

* * *

“Keep ‘em coming, Loke,” Bisca said with a wave of her hand. “I want to be blackout drunk within the next two hours. It has been  _ so _ long since I’ve had a good drink.” 

Levy snorted, but took another sip from her margarita. It had become a weekly occurrence, coming out for drinks with Bisca, Laki, and Kinana, at the bar that Cana and Loke worked at. But Bisca rarely got more than tipsy, due to needing to take care of Asca and wanting to set a good example. But she was gone on a school field trip for the weekend (with Alzack going with her as a chaperone), and her friend was taking full advantage of having the weekend to herself. 

“You got it, Bisca,” Loke said with a grin. “What about the rest of you ladies? Can I get you anything else?” 

“Just another beer,” Laki said. “What about you, babe?” She nudged Kinana. 

“Oh no, I’m alright, thanks though.” She smiled. “It’s weird so weird getting alcohol from you and Cana.  _ I’m _ supposed to be the one giving it to  _ you.”  _

Cana snorted as she leaned against the bar. “Trust me, I fucking miss it. There’s not a single goddamn person in this world who can mix drinks like you and Mira, I swear to the gods. Did you guys lace that shit with something? ‘Cause I swear, nothing hits the same.” 

“Uh… no,” Kinana said. “We most definitely were not lacing the alcohol with anything. The guildhall barely survived you guys being  _ drunk, _ let alone anything else.” 

“Damn, was hoping I was onto something,” she said. 

Levy rolled her eyes. At least some people never changed. “You should tell Lucy to come down for drinks sometime soon. I’ve been here for over two months, and I still haven’t gotten to see her yet!” 

Loke sighed and shook his head. “That reporting job runs her ragged. Guess it’s pretty standard for newbies, but it still sucks. She’s got hardly any free time, and when she gets home she’s always exhausted. But yeah, I’ll let her you know you guys want to see her.” 

“Yeah, somehow reporting is worse than almost getting killed by demons every other day,” Cana said.  _ “I’m _ trying to convince her to just come work here with us, but she swears up and down that she likes it.” 

“Well, she did always like writing,” Levy pointed out. “She’s probably good at it, too!” 

“From what I’ve read, she is,” Cana agreed. “Though I ain’t exactly a literary connoisseur.” 

Levy giggled. “Honestly I didn’t even know you could read.” 

Cana flipped her off, and stepped away to help some other patron. 

“You should come by more often,” Loke said as soon as she was out of earshot, a sad look in his eyes. “She acts more like her old self around you guys.” 

Bisca sighed. “Still having those fits, is she?” 

He nodded. “They’re getting worse. It’s almost daily now. Lucy sent word to Yukino to ask if maybe she and Princess Hisui knew anything, but I’m doubting they will…” 

Levy reached out to take his hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “I’ll keep looking into it. We’ll find some way to help her.” 

“Yeah, don’t worry about it, Loke.” Laki offered him a smile. “Cana’s durable. If anyone could pull through this, it’ll be her.”

“Yeah, I know, it just…” He shook his head. “I hate watching her like this.” He took a deep breath, and his normal grin returned. “But hey, you’re here to have fun! Let’s not dwell too much on it. You know, she and Luce finalized some designs for us to get matching tattoos.” 

“Oh, that’s so romantic!” Kinana exclaimed. “Laki,  _ we _ should get matching tattoos!” 

Laki shrugged. “I’m down, if we could come up with something. What about you, Bisca? You and Alzack have… I dunno, matching cowboy hats or something?” 

Bisca snorted. “I don’t think Alzack is getting a tattoo anytime soon. He’s  _ terrified _ of needles. I have a couple little ones though.” 

“Really?” Kinana leaned closer. “Where? I’ve never seen them! And you don’t exactly wear a lot of clothes.” 

She raised an eyebrow. 

Kinana’s face flared bright red. “Oh.” 

Loke and Laki howled with laughter, and even Levy couldn’t help but chuckle. 

“It’s not funny!” Kinana exclaimed. 

Bisca patted her back. “Eh, don’t worry about it. I got ‘em when I was young and stupid.” 

Loke took a deep breath, calming himself down. “What about you, Levy?” 

“Me?” she squeaked. “I don’t have tattoos! My mother would  _ kill _ me! She freaked out when she saw my guildmark for the first time!” 

He shook his head. “Nah, I knew you didn’t have any. I meant Gajeel. He seems like the kind of guy that would have  _ a lot _ of tattoos. He’s gotta have at least some, right?” 

Levy leaned back, an uncomfortable blush spreading all the way to the tips of her ears. “I-I don’t know why I would know about something like that.” 

“Come on,” Loke purred, resting his elbows on the bar and grinning. “You had to have hooked up with him at least once by now.” 

Levy choked on her own spit, and looked desperately to Bisca, Laki, and Kinana for help, but they were all watching with just as much curiosity. Laki and Bisca even shared the same devilish smirk. “I—We haven’t—Why would you even  _ think—”  _

“Didn’t you bring him to meet your parents?” Bisca asked. 

“That wasn’t what that was!” she protested. 

“You check everyday to see if he’s sent you any kind of letter,” Laki pointed out. 

“Because I’m worried about him! He’s out doing gods know what!” 

“You have that little shelf of books that are easy to read for his reading lessons when he comes to visit,” Kinana said. 

“He asked me to teach him to read! Of course I want to be prepared!” 

“He does that dragon thing where he rubs himself  _ all _ over you to make you smell like him,” Loke said, leaning even closer. “And he managed to do it enough, that you  _ still _ smell like him, even though it’s been months since you’ve seen him.” 

Levy’s mouth clicked shut, the last of her protests and denial fading. “I… Look, maybe I like him,  _ okay? _ I… I really can’t deny that, but we’re not  _ together, _ and we’ve  _ certainly _ never slept together!” 

Loke took a step back, seemingly satisfied with the answer. 

“When he finally gets his ass back here to visit you, you’re asking him out,” Bisca said. 

“I—What?” Levy stared at her with wide eyes. “I can’t just—!” 

“Why the hell not? I asked Alzack out, gods know he was too cowardly to ask  _ me _ out, and I’ll bet Gajeel’s the same damn way,” she said. “So you’re gonna ask him out.” 

“I—I can’t just—” she tried again. 

“Nope!” Bisca slapped her back. “You’re asking him out. End of discussion.” 

Levy grumbled and turned back to her margarita, deciding maybe she didn’t like drunk Bisca as much as she thought she would. 

* * *

Shudders raced up and down Erza’s spine, leaving her entire body trembling. She couldn’t explain why, couldn’t come up with a single plausible reason. This place set her on edge, made her skin crawl and her bones tingle. 

“You okay?” Jellal asked. 

“Something terrible happened here…” she murmured, gazing around the ruins. “Something—I—” She shook her head, forcing her magic down, but she couldn’t stop the golden light from dripping down her fingertips, naturally reacting to the darkness she felt here. 

“Yeah,” Jellal agreed. “I haven’t… felt like this since the Tower of Heaven.” 

“It’s true… isn’t it?” she asked. “These ruins, they have something to do with Zeref.” 

He worked his jaw, hesitating, before saying, “Yeah, I think Cobra and Midnight were right.” 

“I don’t understand.” Erza wrapped her arms around herself, still trying to stifle her light magic. “Why would Master Mavis hide her books out here?” 

Jellal pulled her closer, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. “I don’t know. Maybe she knew no one would ever think to look for them out here. I mean… we haven’t even seen any animals or  _ bugs, _ this place feels so… bad that I think it naturally drives most things away.” 

Erza took a deep breath, and gazed around the ruins. They were  _ ancient, _ some of the oldest she had ever seen. Hell, if they really were where Zeref had hailed from, they were older than  _ Fiore. _ Not much was left, just the stone foundations and pillars, any wood having long since rotted away. But it wasn’t the age that left her on edge, it was the  _ energy. _ It wasn’t dark magic, not quite, it… it was… 

When she was younger, and other slaves at the Tower of Heaven had died, there was… this  _ feeling. _ The second after someone died, this horrible, smothering sense of loss and despair, whether she actually knew the person or not. 

That’s what it felt like in this place. Except it wasn’t for just a second. That feeling  _ clung _ to these ruins. 

“Let’s find those books and get the hell out of here,” she said. “I don’t want to be here for a second longer than we have to be.” 

Jellal hummed in agreement. “Yeah, I don’t blame Cobra and Midnight for refusing to come any further.” 

Erza nodded. At first, she’d been rather irritated with the couple. They’d come all this way, had finally found the place, and then they  _ refused _ to actually look for the diaries? But given the horrible way this place felt, she couldn’t fault them at all. Especially when they had no personal stake in this. “Come on, let’s hurry.” 

* * *

“Erza! I think I found something!” 

Erza dropped the stone she’d turned over, dashing towards Jellal’s voice. They’d been digging through the ancient houses and buildings for what had to be at least three hours now. The sun was setting, and though it would be difficult to continue searching in the dark, Erza  _ really _ didn’t want to end up staying the night here. Or even anywhere remotely  _ close _ to here. She felt like if she fell asleep in a place like this, she’d never wake back up again. 

So she thanked the  _ gods _ that Jellal had found something. 

She found her boyfriend leaned inside what might have once been a fireplace, digging through loose stones and bricks. “Jellal?” 

He tossed aside another stone. “There’s definitely something in here. I think it’s a chest.” He shifted, just barely fitting his shoulders inside the small opening. “Yeah, it’s definitely a chest. Hang on, I think I can get it out.” 

Erza leaned over him, trying to see around him to catch a glimpse of what he was doing. 

“Here we go.” He shifted backwards, pulling out an old, dirty chest, just slightly too big to fit comfortably in his lap. 

She fell to her knees, already summoning a small blade, and shoved it into the chest’s lid, wedging it open before Jellal could even try to fiddle with the locks. 

Dust and dirt exploded out of the chest as she got it open, causing both her and Jellal to fall into small coughing fits. 

“Gods, how long has this thing been out here?” Jellal asked. 

“Depending on when Mavis might have hidden it, it could be nearly a century,” Erza said, letting her knife disappear again. 

Jellal gently set the chest on the ground, so he and Erza could both lean over it, peering inside. 

The dust cleared, and Erza gasped. “Fairy Tail marks!” She grabbed one of the books, blowing on it to get rid of the last layer of dust. “It has a Fairy Tail mark on the cover! These  _ have _ to be hers!” She fell back, crossing her legs, ready to devour whatever information might be inside. 

“Hang on.” Jellal grabbed her wrist. “We’ll have plenty of time to read them all, but let’s get the hell out of here before it gets dark.” 

Erza fought back a whine as he wrenched the book out of her grasp and placed it back inside the chest, but she knew he was right. She’d found them, and though she didn’t want to, she could wait a little longer before she actually  _ read _ them. “Alright, but let’s hurry! I want to read them!” 

“I know, I know,” he chuckled, closing up the chest again. “Let’s get back to camp, and then we can start on them.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise in the next chapter you'll finally get some real information about faeries! All the answers about Gray and Juvia's family, as well as *most* information about the faeries is getting revealed in the next few chapters


End file.
